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Real Jewish Brides: How I selected all my wedding vendors in under 10 weeks

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We got engaged in January, and within 10 weeks, I had booked  all  our wedding vendors. I know, I know. That seems super fast, and a lot of brides are curious to know how I made such quick decisions in such a little amount of time, so I’m here to share my secrets…..

To preface, Alex and I are tying the knot across the country (in the USA) from where we currently live (think 3,700+ km). Rather than having the luxury of meeting potential vendors in person over coffee, at their respective studios, as many brides do, it meant that I was left with word-of-mouth referrals, online reviews, and phone conversations as the sole resources to make my final decision.

To be perfectly honest, the only vendor I really cared about meeting in person was the photographer, and of course seeing the venue IRL (in real life). The biggest challenge, in my opinion, is pin pointing where you want the wedding to be. The venue! And it’s true with what they say — Once you have that locked down, the rest sort of falls in line.

Securing a venue gives you a date and a place. You literally cannot do anything without those two. Picking our venue was slightly overwhelming, but once we stepped foot on Tubac Golf Resort and Spa, we knew we hit the jackpot. As I said before, we loved everything about it, and it incorporated everything both Alex and I envisioned for our wedding. We signed our contract within a week of our return flight to Washington, DC. Boom! We had our venue.

OK, so moving onto the other vendors: photographer, cake baker, musicians, florist, and a wedding planner! Now that’s when the ten weeks of non-stop planning really began.

Luckily Tubac had a list of their preferred vendors, folks that are (1) reasonably priced, (2) familiar with the space, staff, and (3) previous brides had been happy with — all aspects are important to a bride-to-be. I used Tubacs preferred vendor list as a springboard in my hunt.  I decided to focus on one vendor category at a time, and went in the order of which vendors I booked.

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Wedding Planner

Before I began with anything else, I figured that I wanted to secure a wedding planner. Someone to assist not only the day-of, but also guide me through the planning stages.

I had two phone interviews with two women who had been in the business for a long, long time which is great. I wanted someone with years of experience under their belt. They were both wonderful, but one wasn’t available on our wedding date to assist with day-of coordination, and the other was highly recommended by Tubac. It was a no brainer. We hired Jeri, our wedding planner and moved on.

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8 Tips To Get The Most Out Of Your Wedding Photography

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This is a guest post by Rob Clayton

A good wedding photographer should be able to take great photographs at any event, whatever the light, and whatever the circumstances. However, there are things that you, as the bride and groom, to help ensure you get the best possible images from your day

1. Do your research

Find a photographer whose work you love (not just like, but love!), meet up with him or her and make sure you’re the right fit for each other. And then trust them! If you love the photographer’s work, it will be much easier to trust them when they start taking unusual angles, or making seemingly peculiar requests, rather than you having to worry, ‘why are they doing that? Is that the best way to take this photograph or that? Etc’.

2. Discuss things with your photographer

Talk to your photographer about what you do and don’t like, and allow him or her to explain their methodology. This should give you reassurance on the day that there is a method and a purpose behind all their actions (which may not always be obvious).

3. Prepare a shot list

What you really don’t want to happen on your wedding day is to have to stand around thinking about exactly which combinations of people you want in the formal photographs (especially with all your guests stood around you!). A shot-list prepared in advance will not just take the worry away, but will ensure that the formal photographs can proceed smoothly without delay.

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4. Manage your expectations

Unrealistic expectations can only ever lead to disappointment. Your photographer should be able to help guide you in this respect, but just don’t expect the impossible. For example, if you only set aside a small window of opportunity in which to take the formal family photographs, and then produce a gigantic list to get through, it may just not be possible to do them all without re-arranging the timeline (not something the chef will be prepared to do, I can tell you now!).

An example I have had personally, was a request prior to the wedding to take some pictures of the bride and groom on a beach at sunset. The wedding was in Liverpool city centre. Some expectations are just harder to achieve than others.

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How To Build A Chuppah {DIY Tutorial}

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My chuppah ideas page is one of the most popular pages on my Jewish wedding blog, and whilst it’s filled to the brim with chuppah inspiration, what’s missing from it is a DIY tutorial on how to build a beautiful chuppah yourself.

And what could be better than making your own chuppah? After all, the chuppah symbolises the home that you and your partner will build together during your marriage, and by making it yourselves, it will feel that much more special standing under it during your ceremony.

You needn’t worry if you’re not particularly green fingered or creative, as the fabulous Fiona from Revival Rooms has come up with a step-by-step guide for a stylish rustic alternative to the traditional Chuppah with a floral canopy which is genuinely breathtaking.

And the best part? It’s relatively simple to recreate… and cost-effective too!

Here’s Fiona’s step by step guide to building a chuppah.

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What you’ll need

  • 4 Posts and bases
  • Sticks and twigs of various sizes
  • Soap and scrubbing brush
  • Cable ties
  • Chicken wire
  • Secateurs
  • 1mm thick wire
  • Step ladder
  • Flowers – we used white, lavender and purple Stocks and pink Lisianthus
  • Foliage – we used Eucalyptus and Willow

Before you start, it is important to have base poles for your Chuppah. We went to our local B&Q (a DIY supplies store), purchased 4 posts of our desired size, drilled holes into each bottom, and had base plates made at our local hardware shop. The floral canopy can become heavy and it’s important that you have sturdy enough posts to take the weight. Sticks and twigs just won’t be up for the job. Once you have your posts in place you are ready to begin!

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Save The Day with John Lewis

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John Lewis  has always been close to my heart, in fact to most Brits  it’s  pretty much an institution upon which we’ve always relied on. From picking up my first pair of knitting needles for a school project, to getting those navy, leather Mary-Jane school shoes we all wore, and in more recent years bulk-buying cotton sleep suits for my own children, John Lewis has always been there for me.

Apart from that familial reliability – and those heart-wrenching Christmas ads – the other major association most people make with John Lewis has to be the infamous you-can’t-go-wrong wedding gift list.  And again, trusty JL was there for me at one of life’s most important milestones.

But what you may not realise is just how much “wedding” they actually have within those beautifully curated floors.

It really is a bridal cornucopia, an Aladdin’s cave. From occasion wear, gifts, stationery, haberdashery, decorations, fizz and make up, there’s no doubt about it — when it comes to weddings – John Lewis is ALL  over it.

And because it’s so trustworthy and established, it manages to keep everybody happy.  There’s something for every kind of couple, whether you’re seeking classical big day perfection or  a quirkier, more offbeat feel.

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Haberdashery / Wedding Craft

For me, where John Lewis really stands out is as THE home of haberdashery.  And for those who think haberdashery is just a few different types of buttons, think again.

John Lewis has an unmatched range of ribbons, silks, embroidery, braids, fabrics, zips and, yes, buttons.  But also an incredible range of wedding craft and accessories  — its the place where you can pick up the floral corsages, buntings and all the add-ons to bring your big day vision to life, no matter how creative.

And  they also have really cool decorative bits and pieces that can totally liven up your home long after your big day is over. How gorgeous is the East of India range? And take a look at these Rico Alphabet Decor letters  — they’d be just as fab on a shelf in your hallway, as they would be placed next to a guest book at the  wedding.

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8 ways to stick to your wedding budget without compromising style or elegance

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This is a guest post by Alex Boucher

It’s very easy to get  carried away when planning your wedding (it’s all part of the fun after all!). Pinterest boards, blogs, magazines and Instagram accounts are full of ideas you hadn’t even realised you liked; photos of celebrity weddings showing just what a huge budget can buy you.

Setting a budget may not be the most thrilling part of the planning process, but it still beats the panic of overspending! The simple truth is that weddings cost money, and depending on exactly what you want, that could be a sizeable sum. But while there are plenty of articles out there on how to plan your budget, there are not that many on how to stick to it — at least not without losing any panache. So how do you keep your big day classy whilst sticking to that all important figure?

1 . Think carefully about your guest numbers

A brief mention of the budget basics before we start chatting about the details. Firstly, you need to look at the amount that you can honestly afford. With that done you need to prioritise elements of the day eg. if you have a particular venue in mind, or know you want a designer dress. If you haven’t thought about venues yet then I always suggest writing a rough guest list. Sure it won’t be close to the final cut, but it should give you an idea of numbers.

Now, I am aware that Jewish weddings are often  quite large affairs, but this trend is slowly changing and while perhaps still a little controversial (especially with more traditional family members), one of the best ways to stick to a budget without losing class is trim your guest numbers to only people that really mean something special to you; the atmosphere will be more intimate and it will cut the costs dramatically. When you know roughly who you want to invite you can start looking for venues that suit.

2.  Consider venues that don’t need much in the way of decor

Now, here we go with a few little ideas for you to consider when you are thinking about a venue. When you have visited a couple of venues you can see how much they charge so that you can budget accordingly… but it’s a good time to get a little savvy. A dramatic venue (such as the beautiful Kensington Roof Gardens in London) needs very little in the way of embellishment. Sure the initial outlay may be a little more than a blank canvas of a venue, but the saving on decor may actually weigh things out. When looking at a venue don’t just look around starry eyed — think carefully about how much it would take to make the place look how you would like it and if it has all the basics. A marquee or tipi can be wonderful, but not all that cheap when you add on the cost of things like toilet hire. (Ps you need toilets, no negotiation here!)

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Table setting from Missy & Yoni’s Jew-ish wedding  (image: Babb Photo)

3. Enlist talented friends and family

For many, help from others is a way to stretch the budget. You may have family and friends desperate to help with any aspect of the day — from baking your cake to creating your invitations to help save the pennies…. and keen not to hurt feelings as well as watch the cash flow you find yourself agreeing to something that is decidedly more amateur than you would have liked. This is a sticky situation. Certainly accept their kind offer if they can bake like Mary Berry, or have the craft skills of Kirstie Allsopp; however don’t be shy about saying no. If the cake is inedible you will be disappointed — better to buy a decent wedding cake and decorate it inexpensively — and helping to decorate is something that your nearest and dearest can definitely get involved with. I had some cake at a wedding once that looked incredible… but tasted as though it was baked a month ago. Lovely!

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