Disclaimer: I have used the term ‘Bridezilla’ and ‘Groomzilla’ throughout this blog. I as a bride-to-be have chosen to use these terms in a positive and humorous way. The wedding industry has taken these terms and turned them into something negative. I hope that this blog shows that owning the terms and showing the positives of being a bride and groom who know what they want is not something to fear or shy away from.
Last weekend marked one year since Gideon and I got engaged. It is also 5 years since the start of our relationship. A special time for us both and one which has led me to reflect on Gideon’s role in our wedding process and the role of men in weddings in general.
When most people think of men and weddings they see disinterest or allowing the bride to just get on with things. In one Facebook group that I am a member of, future brides are constantly posting about how they feel lonely in the process or that their other halves aren’t really interested in florists or food or themes. However, for me I have the total opposite. I have a groom who wants our wedding to be the most perfect day. He thinks about every small detail and is just as much involved in the wedding process as I am. Of course I am very much the project manager but he makes a remarkable second in command! We are on this continuous journey together and I love that we are learning things about one another as well as supporting and guiding each other.
As I reflect on our wedding planning so far I can see that I am definitely a slight Bridezilla but Gideon is also a slight Groomzilla — we really are the perfect match! In a recent Brides Magazine article ‘5 Signs you are dealing with a Groomzilla’ it talks about this new phenomena sweeping the wedding world. A groom who cares as much, if not more, about creating the perfect wedding for him and his wife to be. I am going to use four of their signs to illustrate why Gideon is not only the perfect Groomzilla but why that makes him the perfect soon to be husband. For some Groomzilla might sound like a nightmare, but teamed with my Bridezilla it’s a match made in heaven, sprinkled with the odd argument and tense moment of course (we are human after all!).
1. He won’t budge
Gideon has got his ideas and is quite set on them. I too have my ideas and am quite set on them. I tend to think his ideas are wrong unless they completely follow my ideas or merely add to them. However, he is quite the same. This has led to some interesting conversations such as: serving Pizza at the wedding. Gideon loves pizza. I like pizza. Gideon feels his wedding would not be his wedding unless Pizza featured somewhere. Once he learnt he wasn’t really going to be featuring at the Reception part of the wedding he turned down the option of having it then. After further consultation regarding a main course of pizza, and finally deciding that creating the whole table out of pizza was completely unrealistic!? We have settled on some sort of Pizza at the hotel for those guests still hungry. (This is a Jewish wedding after all!) I love that he is so passionate about our wedding and making sure that it is completely ‘us’ as I think most of our guests would agree it couldn’t be a Fran and Gid wedding without Pizza and I am really glad he didn’t give up on the dream and Groomzillad his way to getting it!
Luckily on most other things he has pretty much allowed me to have free reign and if I put up enough of an argument supported by clear evidence (Pinterest photos) explaining why I think it is a good idea and why his isn’t, I on the whole win!