A La Femme Bride for a Rainbow Glitz Jewish Wedding at The Rattlesnake Club, Detroit, MI, USA

Happy Valentine’s Day! In honor of February 14, we’re bringing you something extra special today – the Jewish wedding of Amy Becker, who you may know as the inventive foodie behind What Jew Wanna Eat and online Judaica emporium ModernTribe, and groom Andrew, a tech executive.

Amy’s known for colorful (literally!) recipes like rainbow challah (which made an appearance at the wedding) and Jewnicorn hot chocolate, so it’s no surprise she and Andrew cooked up a totally rainbowtastic wedding. The bride describes the wedding theme as “rainbow gold glitter formal,” and in keeping with that vibrant ethos went for a non-traditional and super fun pink La Femme wedding dress. Photographers Holly and Erik and videographer Dustin, both from Mike Staff Productions, captured the day in all its glory.

This wedding was totally, 100% Amy and Andrew, and we’re obsessed with Amy’s advice on going all out to make your big day just the way you want it:

A few people advised us to pick a timeless wedding look, but we did the opposite! Don’t worry about picking something trendy or unique if that’s what you want. We added lots of colored lanterns and a Funfetti cake and neon table numbers and it felt totally us. It may look dated one day, but who cares as long as it reflected you on your special day.

And would you believe that Amy and Andrew planned the whole thing in just four months, and long-distance too?! We’re so touched that Amy credits our very own STG Brides Club with having helped them pull it off. In her own words:

I especially enjoyed bouncing ideas off other brides in the STG Brides Club Facebook group. The girls and Karen feel more like friends, and have the best ideas so you don’t have to nag your friends for feedback. I also stalked the Smashing the Glass website and got so much inspiration from the other wedding posts and the checklists were invaluable.

If you’d like to get in on the Smashing The Glass Brides Club magic too, now’s your chance! We’re currently offering a free 30-day trial so you can check out this wonderful community for yourself – but it’s only valid until Monday 17 Feb at 23:59 PST, so sign up now and see what all the fuss is about!

Everything Bagel Forever

Amy, the bride: We met on the dating app Coffee Meets Bagel when we both lived in San Francisco, and from that day forward I was “Amy Bagel” in Andrew’s phone. Our first date was at the club Andrew is a member of, where he convinced me to try a booze-heavy Vesper instead of my usual red wine. After a few drinks and lots of laughs, we moved onto late-night oysters and talked for hours. On our third date, Andrew made me a multi-course dinner complete with a Funfetti cake to win me over, and it totally did. I was smitten and impressed.

After a month of travelling separately, we reunited on New Year’s Eve 2018, when Andrew changed his flight from Michigan to come back early to celebrate with me. He also brought me back corned beef. I knew he was a special one, and we were exclusive from then on. A few months later he proposed we move to Puerto Rico for a job opportunity, and a year after that he proposed we get married. Both were easy questions to say “yes” to. I’m still “Amy Bagel” in Andrew’s phone, and now I’m his everything bagel forever.

A Detroit Wedding

We got engaged in May 2019 in Puerto Rico, where we live, and Andrew immediately suggested getting married in Detroit, where he grew up, as a wedding location option. I loved this idea because even though I grew up in Connecticut, I have a lot of connections to Michigan as well. Since my best friend is from there and my brother went to college there, I spent a lot of time in Michigan even before I met Andrew (mostly having a bit too much fun on a lake or frolicking around the University of Michigan). My family and friends are spread out across the country, and Detroit is a direct flight for everyone, which we loved. We wanted to make it easy for our guests to celebrate with us without too big of a schlep. Plus, a lot of exciting things are happening in Detroit, and we were excited to show off this city for our guests.

The day after we got engaged (why wait?) I started to scour the internet for all the wedding (and not wedding) venues in the Detroit area. Initially, I wanted something unique like a warehouse, mansion or food truck park, but when I realized we’d have to bring in tables, chairs, work with people who weren’t used to hosting weddings, etc., I decided that a traditional venue made more sense for us with our planning from PR and my desire to make planning easy.

We went up to Detroit for one weekend to basically choose everything, and once Andrew’s mom suggested The Rattlesnake Club, it was our top wedding venue. I loved that we could get married by the water outside (overlooking Canada!) and that our wedding would be the only event happening that day, and Andrew loved the edgy name, classic architecture of the atrium space for the reception and the highly regarded food. When we saw it in person, we knew it was for us.

We didn’t want to wait until after the long Michigan winter to get married, and they also had September 28, 2019 available, so it felt meant to be! We could totally plan a wedding in four months. The venue coordinator, Michelle, was amazing and made planning from Puerto Rico a breeze. I also love that they have a restaurant on the property too, so we can go back and celebrate our anniversaries! 

We wanted our guests to have a mix of old school and modern Detroit and everything we planned for the weekend really showed off this unique city. From the rehearsal dinner at the classic The Pegasus in Greektown, welcome drinks at the very hip tiki bar The Skip, accommodations at the chic The Siren and brunch at the modern Mudgie’s Deli. Most of my friends and family had never been to Detroit and they were all very impressed!

rainbow gold glitter formal 

Andrew and I both love color and don’t take life too seriously. So having a vibrant, fun affair was a must. We wanted delicious food, strong drinks, lively music, and the best people! I wouldn’t have minded if people showed up in Halloween costumes (maybe even preferred it) but Andrew wanted to wear a tux, so we added in some formal and gold details, which really made the wedding feel like us and balanced some of my rainbow visions (in a good way). So I guess our theme was rainbow gold glitter formal? We didn’t use a wedding planner but did have a day of coordinator. We were really decisive in choosing vendors first, and then adding all the personal details leading up to the big day, so planning wasn’t too hard and by the time September rolled around we were more than ready!

What ‘Smashing The Glass’ Brides Club’ Did For Us 

I especially enjoyed bouncing ideas off other brides in the Brides Club Facebook group. The girls and Karen feel more like friends, and have the best ideas so you don’t have to nag your friends for feedback. I got my amazing robe idea from one of the fellow brides, and made some other decisions like how to do our escort cards from the group. I also stalked the Smashing the Glass website and got so much inspiration from the other wedding posts and the checklists were invaluable. I especially loved checking off from the main list as we booked items.

Invitation

The invitation was something neither of us cared about at all. I used Postable for the invitations since they mail them for you, which is so so easy and I highly recommend it. You can order a sample and then they do the rest. I found one template that was modern with a pink heart and an orange heart at the top, which are our favorite colors, so it felt like us. They also allowed us to customize the wording to say exactly what we wanted. At the wedding, we incorporated orange and pink in the photo booth print outs and also used the hearts on our menus, so it really tied in well in the end and I ended up really loving the invitation. We used them for our thank you notes too.

Hair + Makeup

I was soooo lucky to find our hair and makeup team. I wanted to find someone who was available to do a trial during the one weekend we were in Michigan and also on our wedding day, and Fame by Mary Riley was it! She also happens to do a lot of Jewish weddings, which I didn’t learn until after we met. Bashert, right? She recommended our hairstylist, Courtney Leibich, who I loved so much I had her do my highlights too. I couldn’t have picked a better team- they are both so nice and do the best work. I wanted my hair down with a good blowout and secure veil, and makeup to be pink and shimmery with a bold lip.

A La Femme Dress

I knew I wanted color involved in my wedding dress or veil somehow, and also knew I didn’t have much time since our wedding was four months after we got engaged. I already had a trip to visit my parents scheduled before Andrew proposed, so I planned to go to a few wedding dress stores with my mom and bubbe and also browsed ready-to-wear dresses online as another option. I ordered a few from La Femme from Neiman Marcus, that were delayed and came in on the last day of my trip.

None of the dresses in the stores were for me; I wanted something simple yet unique and everything was covered in beads and lace. I felt discouraged but excited for the dresses in the mail. As soon as I tried on the La Femme shimmery pink one I ordered, my mom and bubbe cried and we all knew it was the one! I couldn’t have designed a better dress for myself- it was the perfect fit and flare shape with the straps and neckline I wanted and even had pockets and was so comfortable! My mom has the best tailor, so I came back once to take it in and up and the dress was done.

Accessories

I knew I wanted to wear a veil – to me that’s even more bridal than a white dress. Because how often can you get away with a veil? Not often enough. After purchasing the dress, I thought that a shorter, cascading veil would match the whimsical dress and also I wanted to wear it all night since I was wearing my hair down. I bought the veil at Novella Bridal while we visiting San Francisco and didn’t have the dress with me, but hoped it would work. With a very sparkly comb, it looked perfect! I also wore sparkly earrings from Nordstrom and a diamond cocktail pinky ring of my mom’s for my something borrowed. And of course my engagement ring and wedding band, which Andrew designed using his grandmother’s cocktail ring. I had no idea he was proposing so it was very special to know he had been planning the rings for months and so thrilling to wear them together!

Shoes

I was prepared to drop some money on wedding shoes – a wedding is a great excuse for a pair of designer shoes, right? Since my dress was silvery pink, I wanted something silver and sparkly to not compete too much. In the end, the shoes I liked the best that were the comfiest were on sale for only $25 by Caparros, so I also got a pair of sparkly Betsey Johnson rhinestone flats from her blue bridal collection. And had money leftover to purchase flamboyant ensembles for my bachelorette party!

The handsome groom

Andrew wore a custom-made tux from Simpson Sin Tailor in Hong Kong, and he looked so handsome in it! We need more formal affairs to attend so he can wear his tux again.

Bridesmaids

I initially didn’t want to have bridesmaids but Andrew wanted groomsmen, so we each had four friends get ready with us and take a few formal photos, but not walk down the aisle. It ended up being the perfect happy medium! Because of this, I had my girls wear any long dress they wanted and Andrew had his guys to wear tuxes. Weirdly my girls ended up matching in shades of gold and blue (a subconscious choice to pick University of Michigan-esque colors?) They also got their hair and make-up done, and it was fun getting ready together at the uber-cool Siren Hotel. They all looked so great! What an attractive group of friends we have.

Chuppah

We wanted something modern and colorful but that didn’t take away from the natural beauty of the outdoor space. I found inspiration on Pinterest and Top That! Event created something we loved! We accidentally chose a lot of geometric gold features in our cake stand, place cards, cocktail hour decor, etc, so I wanted the chuppah to fit this look too and they made us a copper chuppah with a few bunches of bright fun flowers.

Ceremony

I LOVED our ceremony. My favorite part of the day! As co-owner of ModernTribe, I wanted to involve some of our vendors in our wedding day. We used a smash glass from Rosetree Glass and are having it made into a vase after the wedding. The ketubah was a custom gold glitter acrylic (the official acrylic name is wedding ring) by Rafi of Impression Judaica. Rafi had never made a glitter ketubah before, just his glitter mezuzahs that we carry that I love. But he was up for the challenge and it came out even better than I hoped!

We signed the ketubah outside with our immediate family and grandparents there (they signed the ketubah as well). We also had my brother (and ModernTribe co-owner) officiate the wedding. It was actually Andrew’s idea ask my brother, and it was so so special. We wrote our own vows, which was important to me since we both love to write and it added a personal element to the ceremony. Andrew’s vows blew me away. My favorite part of the ceremony for sure. I knew they’d be good, but they were so good. All our guests were laughing and crying, it was a beautiful emotional mess.

Our music choice

We love music and dancing and wanted our choices to be fun to reflect the joyful day. We had disco music playing while people were getting seated pre-ceremony. Andrew walked down the aisle with his parents to ‘Can’t Get Enough of Your Love Baby’ by Barry White (so good) and I walked down with my parents to ‘Take My Breath Away’ by Berlin (yes, from Top Gun) and we walked back up the aisle to ‘Only Wanna Be with You’ by Hootie and the Blowfish as our friends threw flower confetti. I was kind of obsessed with our ceremony music, it really set the stage for a fun day. We didn’t have a first dance and were supposed to enter to ‘Power of Love’ by Huey Lewis and the News but the DJ played ‘Signed, Sealed, Delivered’ instead, which was still great! Then everyone joined us on the dance floor to get the party started right away.

Flowers

We used Top That! Event for flowers and decor (colored lanterns, chair ribbons, and twinkle lights!). They also printed our escort cards and menus too. I wanted something bright, whimsical and not too traditional for the flowers, and after some back and forth of ideas they totally delivered! We also had packets of dried flowers with our names and wedding date on it that guests could throw at the end of the ceremony that was so festive too. It made for some great photos!

Photographers, videographer and DJ

Since we were a wedding in Detroit from Puerto Rico, I wanted to make everything as easy as possible. I found Mike Staff Productions and they got great reviews, were super easy to communicate with, and gave a discount when we booked photographers, videographer and DJ with them, so it was an easy choice! I would 100% book them again. We loved Holly and Erik, our photographers, and Dustin our videographer. We hardly noticed they were there capturing the day and love how they captured the day. And Ron the DJ played the best song choices and he totally got our style.

Food

The Rattlesnake Club provided the food, and it could not have been tastier. Everyone raved about it! We had passed apps, an oyster tower, and antipasto during cocktail hour. They normally do a plated dinner, but were so accommodating to our idea to do stations instead to go with our party vibe to keep people dancing, not sitting. We had all our favorites from sushi to a carvings station with horseradish sauce and Caeser salad. Andrew and I are very into food and it was all delicious. They also let us choose specific brands of liquor for the bar too, which was essential to my mixologist of a groom. He wooed me with his cocktail making skills, so I knew we had to have excellent wedding cocktails.

Andrew wooed me even more by making me a Funfetti cake on our third date, so we knew we wanted a Funfetti cake covered in rainbow sprinkles at our wedding. We got it from Holiday Market and even though I just got a bite (too busy dancing!) we heard from our sweets-loving guests it was the best wedding cake they’ve had. We topped it with a “The Beckers” sign from Etsy and sloth bride and groom (we love sloths, who doesn’t?) also from Etsy.

Entertainment

We wanted our wedding to be a party and I feel like a DJ accomplishes that vibe and can play a wide range of songs from oldies to 90’s. When we heard that DJ Ron was the grandson of one of the Four Tops, it sealed the deal for us! We had the DJ perform during the ceremony and cocktail hour too which helped the party vibe flow all day.We only requested a few songs (I wanted ‘Africa’ by Toto and ‘Despacito Remix’ while Andrew wanted ‘The Final Countdown’ by Europe) and then let the DJ do his thing. We had a few dance-offs (my friend and I battled it out to Brandy and Monica’s ‘The Boy is Mine’) and even a soul train. People danced the whole night, which is what we wanted!

Favors

We had a photobooth from Shutterbooth so guests could take home their photos, but no other favors. We also had welcome bags with local treats like chips from Zingerman’s Deli for people staying at the hotel.

 
Personal touches

I made my signature What Jew Wanna Eat rainbow challah, cut with a Kate Spade challah knife from ModernTribe, which one of Andrew’s friends lead the blessing over.

I didn’t do much DIY even though I love crafting (I’ll save that for my Halloween costumes), but I made some photo booth signs out of black and gold glitter paper with more personal sayings like “Ay Papi” or “Mazel”. People asked where I bought them so I guess they looked legit!

Our signature cocktails were very meaningful to us. The vesper is the first drink we shared together on our first date. I was going to order wine, but had a sip of Andrew’s strong vesper and the rest is history! And the piña colada and whiskey coco are special to us as drinks from our new home of Puerto Rico.

We added lots of personal touches from neon table numbers and drink signs to the colorful decor to the song choices. We had just our parents give speeches since we wanted as much dancing time as possible, and they were all great! Everyone commented that the wedding was so US, which is just what you want to hear.

Honeymoon

We went to Japan in December 2019. We spontaneously booked a trip to Japan about 6 weeks into dating but had to cancel it due to health reasons. So we were excited to finally get to go and eat lots of sushi and swim in hot springs with monkeys.

  
Advice to couples currently planning their wedding

A few people advised us to pick a timeless wedding look, but we did the opposite! Don’t worry about picking something trendy or unique if that’s what you want. I wanted a glitter bat mitzvah invitation and ended up with a classy rose-colored one and I still would have picked glitter today! We added lots of colored lanterns and a Funfetti cake and neon table numbers and it felt totally us. It may look dated one day, but who cares as long as it reflected you on your special day. I’d rather not pick something safe that felt boring or generic.

Pick a few things you care about and let the rest go. Luckily our families were very chill in letting us do what we wanted, but my mom really wanted more desserts and a post-wedding brunch so we added rainbow macarons and brunch at a modern Jewish deli. Both ended up being fun additions that I wouldn’t have done otherwise, so listen to suggestions and if you can make your people happy without compromising your vision, then it’s worth it.

Don’t forget about your groom! Everyone talks about the bride, but it’s his day too. Andrew wore whatever he wanted (he went with a classic tux) and we made sure the food and liquor selection included his favorites. I did most of the research and reaching out to vendors, but involved Andrew in all the final decisions especially in the things he cared about such as music selection.

Karen suggested hiring a day of coordinator, which was great advice so we didn’t have to worry about a thing on the big day. Totally worth it. We started earlier than we needed to as well, I didn’t want the wedding day to rush by, and I figured I wouldn’t sleep in anyway! This was great as we didn’t rush anything and had extra time to see the reception space before the ceremony, take some alone time, etc. The whole day was relaxed.

Also, everyone says you’ll go over budget but it was important to me to stay on budget. I kept a simple spreadsheet and had an approximate amount I wanted to spend in each area plus a healthy amount leftover, which ended up going towards last-minute costs like the DOC, photobooth, vendor tips, etc. It would have stressed me out if we spent more than we meant to and I don’t think you have to go into debt to have your perfect wedding. I saved money by using the tables, chairs, linens, etc provided by the venue, didn’t go over the top on flowers, chose inexpensive invitations, but also made sure we had the food quality and top-shelf liquor selection we wanted. You don’t have to go over budget.

Amy & Andrew’s little white book

Photography – Mike Staff Productions
Videography – Mike Staff Productions
Venue – The Rattlesnake Club
Bride’s dress – La Femme purchased at Neiman Marcus
Bride’s shoes – Betsey Johnson
Bride’s accessories – Nordstrom and Novella Bridal
Groom’s attire – Simpson Sin Tailor
Hair + Makeup – Courtney Leibich and Fame by Mary Riley
Flowers and decor – Top That! Event
Cake – Holiday Market
Challah knife – Kate Spade
Cake topper and sloths – Etsy
Ketubah – Impression Judaica
DJ – Mike Staff Productions
Invitations – Postable
Photobooth – Shutterbooth
Smash Glass – Rosetree Glass
Smash The Glass Pouch – Smashing The Glass Etsy Shop {or join Smashing The Glass’s Brides Club and get one for free!}
Before and after the wedding – The Pegasus, The Skip, The Siren and Mudgie’s Deli

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