Juliette will be marrying Matt on 9th November 2019 at Ashford Estate in Allentown, New Jersey, USA. Click here to read all Juliette’s planning posts to date.
THREE FACTS: (1) Juliette and Matt met in Hebrew school when they were 16 – aww! (2) Juliette and Matt are both Jewish, but they are having a Jew-ish wedding – Juliette’s dad’s side of the family is Catholic, and they want to make sure everyone feels included on the day. (3) Juliette is a member of Smashing The Glass’s Brides Club – and she calls STG her “secret weapon” in wedding planning!
Bride and bridesmaids dresses: a huge deal
Weddings are full of glamour. The simplest of weddings at a courthouse to the most lavish affairs (my mom is nodding at this) have the unspoken element of glamour and effervescence. I think it comes from the fact that you know you are actively making memories on that day, rather than the other days of your life where memories just happen. Your wedding day is special.
With that in mind I knew the dresses both mine, and my bridesmaids were going to be a HUGE deal. I was inundated the second I was engaged with Pinterest photos of bridesmaids and dream dresses for myself. It was honestly overwhelming.
Choosing a dress as a plus size bride
I knew I wanted to get my dress first, before the opinions, budgets and all that comes with the odd experience of picking out someone else’s dress on a day they know they will be photographed on. I actually, spur of the moment, did my first dress try on at the Kleinfeld sample sale because an ad popped up on my Instagram (I see you targeted marketing) mentioning they carried plus sizes.
I hopped down to Chelsea with my mom and tried on the few they had in my size. I felt myself in that age old trap, where if it fits you need it, even if it is not what you want. There was a dress there I really thought I should get, but when I sent it to my friend Lauren she literally told me I was wearing a dirty dish rag. So, I realized I needed a more structured appointment.
We walked across the street to Kleinfeld and made an appointment for a Saturday in the next month. I became a ball of anxiety. As a plus size bride I know my options are more limited, just because many designers haven’t jumped on the train to making over a size 12.
I knew I wasn’t going to drop 100 pounds in a month, so instead I just focused on what I could control. I talked to Kleinfeld about finding a consultant who specialized in plus size brides with overbearing mothers, and they assured me everyone is well trained. I called my photographer who has been in the business for around the same time as Kleinfeld, and asked them who they had brides go to.
The right people with me
I invited people who I knew would not stress me out on the day of. I asked my mom, but told her she can’t make “the face”. (The face: this true performance piece that translates to “this is too unflattering for words”, simply close and purse your lips, puff your cheeks out, wrinkle your brow, and shake your head no.) She promised she wouldn’t. I invited my sister aand maid of honor Victoria, my childhood best friend/bridesmaid /NYC neighbor Kaite, and my aunt Tina who has fabulous taste that is very similar to my own.
Before we went, I sent them styles of dresses I was considering. To my mother’s dismay they were not all sparkly poufy ball gowns. When we arrived that morning to the waiting room we all had our best hair and makeup on. They had set up a photo booth as all the nervous brides waited around teaming with anticipation for their consultant to come get them. My aunt Tina brought a banana flask so we all took a sip to calm the nerves!
The actual experience
My fantastic consultant, Farrah, lead us into the main show room and sat us on couches with mirrors and she took me to the back where I showed her options I liked in the dressing room. I changed into my robe and she returned with five dresses straight off my Pinterest board. The first one, which I had originally planned on leaving with was AWFUL. Very dish water glam.
The second was very comfortable, covered in sparkles and sexy but, when I saw a photo of myself in it I looked like Ursula from the Little Mermaid if she went to prom. NOT CUTE.
My third dress was spectacular. Even before I got to the stand with my family and friends other brides and shoppers were stopping to tell me this was the one. (Fun fact: I tried on a few after because I wanted to be sure and 2 different consultants stole it from the dressing room for their brides!) I came out and it was very emotional. It was this weird shocking out of body experience. We talked through some concerns with alterations and the custom order we needed so it would fit me the best. I added a veil and said yes as everyone around me wept and I stood their letting the skirt dance under my fingertips.
Did I go over budget? Yes. Did I have a moment of panic? Yes. Did my mom make the face? Only once! I left so happy and excited. I am now counting the days until the dress arrives!
However, all the feelings I had when finding this dress made me really think I would be sympathetic and helpful for choosing the bridesmaid dresses, and well that didn’t go exactly as I had planned.
Bridesmaids dress shopping
My bridesmaids, all 9 of them, are gorgeous and I really thought finding them a bridesmaid dress would be easy! My original plan had everyone matching in gold sparkles. It wasn’t until we visited a large warehouse of bridesmaid dresses in NYC that I saw how this vision might not be what I wanted for my wedding. They were troopers trying on all types of dresses in a myriad of sizes that didn’t really work. While they were trying on what felt like every option I called the Jenny Yoo boutique, and begged them for an appointment.
I had seen their new dress collection online and was ecstatic when they fit us in. Kaite served as tribute to try on their whole collection. I immediately fell in love with a very sexy slim fitting dress and I decided those were the ones.
A month passed, and everyone assured me the dresses were great. It wasn’t until the night before the final appointment that some of my bridesmaids expressed concerns. I know how important clothes can be, the right look can completely change your state of mind and I wanted them to feel confident.
So, when we got to the store I surprised them and offered three dress choices, with the only rule being that it had to be 3 girls in each dress. You could feel the renewed excitement as my best friends twirled around in their favorite gown choices.
Picking the dresses has been one of the most fun activities in planning the wedding! I loved having events where I could really involve my bridal party. This week all the dresses came in and I was flooded with pictures and texts from my bridesmaids! It has really solidified that I made the right choice with the dresses and I can now envision how amazing they will all look walking down the aisle!
Click here to read all Juliette’s planning posts to date.
Juliette & Matt’s Wedding Vendors booked so far:
Venue – Ashford Estate
Photographer – Fred Marcus Studio {offers a free engagement shoot to all members of Smashing The Glass’s Brides Club}
Bride’s dress – Kleinfeld
DJ – LJDJs
Bridesmaids – Jenny Yoo
You Look Gorgeous Juliet! It’s certainly a huge task trying to find bridesmaid outfits! I look the black tie look with you and Matt in all black. Lovely couple.