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How to handle overwhelm + stress during wedding planning {with Howard Cooper and Blake Ezra}

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Planning a wedding is exciting, there’s no question about that. But it can also be stressful – from dealing with family drama and pressure along the way to feeling less than comfortable being the center of attention on the big day, there are so many elements that can be anxiety-provoking.

Usually we focus on the fun and meaningful aspects of a wedding, and while those are always front of mind for us, the truth is there are a lot of difficult issues wedding planning can bring out (and that’s one of the big reasons why I started Smashing The Glass’s bride-to-be community, Brides Club – a safe space for everyone to be open and honest about the real ups and downs of the engaged life.). 

Meaningful conversations, and talking about mental health and weddings are so important – and that’s what I’m so excited to be chatting live with one of my favorite Jewish wedding photographers, and Smashing The Glass Recommended Vendor Blake Ezra, and Howard Cooper, one of Britain’s leading rapid change therapists, all about dealing with wedding anxiety.

Known for helping people to create rapid shifts in their thinking, Howard’s rapid change approach rejects the notion that deep and lasting change needs to take a long time. Drawing on a variety of psychological tools, Howard has supported thousands of individuals over the past 15 years on an international level, bringing about transformational changes to their lives. A specialist in helping people tackle fears and phobias, Howard uses a practical, dynamic and innovative approach to help people from all walks of life and ages.

With over 150 Jewish weddings under his belt (many of which have appeared here on Smashing The Glass) plus a BA (Hons) in Hebrew and Jewish Studies, Blake has a deep understanding of the traditions and rituals of a Jewish wedding and the ways brides, grooms, and families tend to respond to the unique dynamics a Jewish (or Jew-ish) wedding can bring out.

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Why LUZ’s Urban Photography Style Might Be Right for You

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This is a guest post by the team at international wedding photographers LUZ. 

Nowadays, there’s more diversity of style within the wedding industry than ever before: the event’s design, the wedding dress and groom suit’s styles, and of course the wedding photography style.

More often than not, when asked to imagine and describe wedding photography, people will refer to romantic photoshoot at sunset, or in a magical Norwegian forest.

But there is an up and coming alternative wedding photography style, one that appeals to couples who value an urban lifestyle — we’re talking about urban wedding photography.

What is urban photography?

While the focus of a photoshoot in a natural environment is the romance, the tenderness, and the fantasy of fairytales, urban wedding photography is all about using the day to day environment – the city – from a completely different perspective.

Different colors and textures of walls, light and shadow, movement, composition – these are all tools that we use to create an interesting (and beautiful) photoshoot. There are also different personal elements that can be integrated into the photoshoot: a specific color that excites you, the place you first met, or even just an amazing structure with architecture that takes your breath away and makes you want to look at it forever.

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Planning a Wedding The Second Time Around

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Planning-a-wedding-second-time-around
The first time around: a big, white wedding

The first time around, there was a big simcha, most of which I planned over a six-month period when I happened to be on a sabbatical from my job. I threw myself into the process of planning, and even now I remember all the things — so many things — the color scheme (from the flowers right down to the napkins), the personalized cake-topper, the wedding favors we left on the tables for our guests. There were a lot of details. It was, I remember, event planning at its most involved. I remember the price tag for the wedding, too.

My first wedding was, in fact, a most beautiful wedding, one in which our guests walked away having been entertained, very well fed and having danced for hours to live music. The wedding sated the bridal fantasies I’d had since I was old enough to know what a wedding was.

The thing about fantasy is that it is the opposite of reality. The complexity of two individuals in any relationship with each other is a reality; unexpected curveballs are sometimes thrown when we least expect it. So it is that my first marriage was not to last.

Reflections after the first wedding

Now that I am in a different stage in my life, I feel that the challenges I encountered when I stared divorce in the face have made me stronger. My experience has given me a great deal of appreciation for what I have now with my fiancé; I take nothing for granted.

The most important thing — the key element when planning a wedding – is that the man you are marrying is the right man for you. Everything else is just scenery, background, backdrop.

I’m now in the throes of planning my second wedding, one in which there is no retinue, no color scheme, no sit-down meal. The most crucial detail, the one I think about daily, is that I’m marrying a man who makes me incredibly happy.

Our wedding date will be just three months from the date we got engaged. I’m learning that it is totally possible to plan a wedding in three months, and whilst working full time, too.

The process has been fun – my fiancé and I set a small-ish budget which we are firmly sticking to; it’s been so satisfying to find real bargains and to prioritize only what’s most important: for us it was: an atmospheric venue, great live music and an excellent photographer. It took us about three weeks to find these three things.

It was not all that long ago that I planned my first wedding, so I have the benefit of experience, contacts in the wedding industry in my city, and lessons learned from having done this before.

Yet I have never done this before — marry a man so good, so kind, so well suited for me. I am counting the days until I can call this mensch of a man my husband.Continue ReadingContinue Reading

Smashing The Glass Featured in Today’s New York Times!

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Karen Cinnamon
What an exciting day! I have been published in the New York Times — a publication with global influence and readership that I hold in very high regard.

The New York Times journalist, Hilary Sheinbaum, first got in touch with me about the story a few months ago and to see it finally in print today is a dream come true!

If you’re reading this in the USA you can read all about it in today’s New York Times ‘Sunday Styles’ section. If you’re not, click here to see the online version, and find out what I have to say about chuppahs, getting creative with yours, and how budget has absolutely nothing to do with it.

The chuppah symbolises the home you and your partner will build together during your marriage, but as well as using the chuppah to symbolize your home, I’m a big advocate of letting your personality shine through too!

Today The New York Times; tomorrow, the world!

Love,

A Martina Liana Bride for a Beachy Jewish Wedding in Delray Beach, Florida, USA

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Jewish wedding Delray Beach , Florida USA_0023
It’s always a pleasure to write up the wedding of one of our Real Jewish Brides, and today’s is no exception! We love that Dawn and Harley made their Jewish wedding all about family and friends. With a “basketball team-sized” wedding party, friendors aplenty, a delicious kosher pareve cake from Smashing The Glass Recommend Vendor Ana Paz Cakes to include kosher-keeping guests, and plenty of family participation in the ceremony, the couple’s day was truly centered around the people they love.

Dawn, a career counselor, and Harley, an online entrepreneur, chose to hold their elegant beach-themed wedding at the Delray Beach Marriott in Delray Beach, Florida, out of deference to their many out-of-town guests.

Their day was captured beautifully by Jack Bates Photography, which is owned by a friend of the couple. Their videographers were also friends–Shelley, the female half of the husband and wife duo behind Gibson Production, even did double duty as a bridesmaid!

And did we mention that Dawn chose her gorgeous Martina Liana gown a whopping 14 months before the wedding?! She made an appointment on a whim after learning about an end-of-season sale, and, despite having barely begun her search, knew she’d found the one.

We’re sad to say goodbye to Dawn here on STG, but we’re sure you’ll enjoy reading about the day in her own words!

Jewish wedding Delray Beach , Florida USA_0049

Jewish wedding Delray Beach , Florida USA_0023

Jewish wedding Delray Beach , Florida USA_0023
How we met

Dawn, the bride: in the summer of 2013, Harley and I both joined JDate. He was moving to South Florida by himself from Montreal and looking to make a connection, and I may have been a bit bored in graduate school looking for some Jewish romance! Although neither of us actually lived in Palm Beach County at the time (he still had a few more weeks in Montreal, and although I am originally from Palm Beach I had one more year of graduate school in North Florida), we both indicated that we were from the area and showed up in each other’s searches. We began messaging, Facebook-ing, texting, and Skype-ing (to ensure that neither one was a 60-year-old cat lady) every day until we finally met on June 24th, 2013… just hours after he had officially moved to the United States!

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