How incredibly gorgeous is the Jewish wedding of South African couple Jess, an entrepreneur, and Dan, a financial director for a property company?! These two knew from the beginning they wanted to make their big day into a weekend away where they could kick back and enjoy the time with their family and friends, and they opted for a stunning game lodge highlighting South Africa’s stunning nature.
Jess and Dan kicked things off with a game drive and dinner in a candlelit cave in advance of their Sunday wedding, which took place outdoors right in the midst of the South African bush. To make the most of the scenery, the whole wedding, from chuppah to reception, took place outside (luckily, there was no rain!). We’re obsessed with the fact that the couple wed under a gorgeous 400-year-old (!) rock fig tree, and how special is it that Jess’s dad built the chuppah from scratch? And how beautiful are the luminous images from Agape Wedding Photography?
In the leadup to her wedding, Jess joined Smashing The Glass’s Brides Club, and we’re so touched by her wonderful words about the members club:
I have loved every minute of being part of STG Brides Club, the sense of community from total strangers, turned friends is just incredible. There is no better place to ask questions, share ideas, as well as wedding woes and wins than Brides Club! Dare I say the spin off from Brides Club, Smashing Life, is even better! None of us could bear the thought of leaving the community once we got married and it has become a place I often turn to for inspiration or advice.
Now we’ll turn you over to Jess…
How we Met
Jess, the bride: We met on Tinder which was an absolute fluke because I was in another city at the time at my best friend’s wedding and Dan did not usually look outside a certain radius.
Wedding Weekend
We got married at the incredible Monate Lodge in South Africa. It was the first venue we looked at and just knew it was perfect! We really wanted a weekend away where we could celebrate and spend time with our family and friends that had travelled from as far as London, Germany, Singapore and the USA, where everyone could truly relax and get to know each other.
We had an intimate dinner on Friday evening with our bridal party and family. On Saturday afternoon the majority of our guests arrived and our activities started with a game drive, sundowners at the ‘Hippo Dam’ and ending with dinner inside a candlelit cave. Our wedding took place on the Sunday in the middle of the African bush. It was absolutely perfect for our guests to have a mini-holiday and our every need was taken care of by the incredible management team and staff.
What ‘Smashing The Glass Brides Club’ Did For Us
I have loved every minute of being part of STG Brides Club, the sense of community from total strangers, turned friends is just incredible. There is no better place to ask questions, share ideas, as well as wedding woes and wins than Brides Club! Dare I say the spin off from Brides Club, Smashing Life, is even better! None of us could bear the thought of leaving the community once we got married and it has become a place I often turn to for inspiration or advice.
Natural Romance
We wanted a romantic wedding that reflected our relaxed and down to earth nature. We did not want all the fuss of overcrowded tables so went with simple white tablecloths, muted blush napkins and the flowers we chose added the gorgeous pop of colour to bring everything to life against the back drop of the African bush. Our reception was held in a boma surrounded by huge rocks so it really didn’t need a whole lot of work to make it as gorgeous as it was.
The overhead bulb lighting and white candles gave us the romantic feel we were after. Our entire wedding was held outdoors (during the rainy season!) and luckily there was a crazy downpour the day before, but our wedding day had the most perfect weather!
Invitations / stationery
We designed our invitations ourselves on withjoy.com to keep within our budget, and for our wedding stationery we used Rochelle from Papermoon who was a dream to work with! I am quite particular about what I want and she helped bring my ideas to life. I have always loved leaf shapes and trees of any kind so we used this theme throughout our stationery as well as a world map for guests to leave a note pinned to when they arrived to check in.
We designed programs for the ceremony to include all the different rituals that take place so our guests could find the ceremony more meaningful as well as program for the weekends events.
Hair + Make-up
I wanted to look like myself on our wedding day so I went with a relaxed style of wavy curls and wore my hair down. I chose champagnes and brown tones for my make-up but after the initial photos were taken and before walking down the aisle, I just did not feel like myself. I landed up doing a little DIY to lighten my eye make-up and felt a lot more like myself! I would emphasise the importance of doing a make up trial and taking photos in a natural light to see if you like the final look before committing to a make-up artist.
A Joss Couture Dress
The incredible Joss from Joss Couture designed and made my wedding dress. I had gone the traditional route of trying on dresses at boutiques but could not find anything I loved. Joss helped bring my idea to life and we found the perfect leafy lace to use with soft tulle layers to fit our romantic theme.
Accessories
Dan gifted me a gorgeous pair of leaf (kind of ‘leaf design’ obsessed) earrings that my co-Maid of Honour designed and made for me. She also designed and made my engagement and our wedding rings. She is super talented and I feel so privileged to have these special pieces made by a lifelong friend.
Shoes
I really wanted shoes with a floral detail and a wedge heel so I could wear them outdoors, but that were also casual enough for me to wear after the wedding. I was lucky enough to visit my other co-Maid of Honour in the USA a few months before our wedding and the day before I flew home, we went to Macy’s to look for shoes with her two toddlers and a newborn baby in tow (crazy, I know!).
On the way there I told her exactly what I wanted down to the last detail. The second pair of shoes I laid my eyes on were exactly what I had described. Stacey insisted on buying them for me, which added to the already incredible inexperience as I am a very sentimental person and was such a kind gesture.
The handsome groom
Dan wore a 3-piece tailor-made navy suit, with brown leather shoes and a custom-made belt. The tailors we used went out of their way for us and even did two house visits for fittings to accommodate our schedules. He looked very dapper and handsome! We chose navy blue because it was a more relaxed feel for the bush wedding we had planned.
Bridesmaids
I had four bridesmaids and initially I wanted a muted blush or a light burnt orange, but couldn’t find the right shade or material. My amazing dress designer came to the rescue and found a gorgeous, timeless navy blue made from scuba material. They all had the same style, but can easily wear the dress again. They all looked stunning! Navy can sometimes photograph black in the photos so make sure your photographer captures the dresses in the right light if you choose navy.
Ceremony
Our favourite part was getting married under a 400-year old Rock Fig Tree. The tree was a big reason for choosing the venue in the first place as it really added to the already beautiful surroundings and I had wanted to get married under a tree since I was a little girl. I converted to Judaism roughly a month before our wedding, so it was an incredibly special occasion having all our family and friends celebrate with us, some having never attended a Jewish wedding.
A memory that stands out for us was seeing our bridesmaids (none were Jewish) dance us down the aisle with the groomsmen after smashing the glass – something they just dived right in to doing with no practice at all as this not something done outside of Jewish weddings. Just before we walked out the wooden doors our guests were waiting to shower us with bougainvillea flowers, this has always been one of my favourite photos to look at when seeing other weddings. Our bedeken was held with just our closest family and bridal party before the ceremony and is something I will always treasure.
Ketubah
Our ketubah was custom designed using a laser cut style. Our stationer, Rochelle from Papermoon, went the extra mile to create something meaningful and used an olive tree as the base for the design symbolic of many important Jewish values. We also had a ring box with our monogram made from olive wood.
Chuppah
We wanted something classy and elegant that would not detract from the natural beauty of the surroundings. My dad handmade our chuppah from scratch and travelled over 800km with it to the venue. It was so special to have this key element also made by a family member with the many hours of love that went into making it.
Our Music Choice
We created a playlist of our favourite songs to dance to, but we had Jonathan Birin lead the music for the day. I walked down the aisle to Jonathan singing ‘Boi Kallah’ and our first dance was ‘Come Away With Me’ by Norah Jones. The dancing was interspersed with live singing from Jonathan as well as playing the songs we had chosen. We also hired a saxophonist, Phil, who kept our guests entertained during cocktail hour and on the dancefloor late into the evening.
Flowers
We chose Ashleigh from The Love Knot and chose different tones of pink, orange, white and greens for our flowers. Nothing was too much for her and I am pretty fussy when it comes to choosing flowers. My favourite flower was the pink bougainvillea which Ashleigh sourced and dried so that they would look perfect on the day. It reminds me of my childhood and so I had my heart set on having this in all the arrangements.
It was the perfect combination of colours and I am obsessed with how everything came together like we had dreamed. We used white and green for the bridal party and families button holes. I also wanted peonies in my bouquet, and Ashleigh so cleverly bought fake one’s to use which looked so real hidden between the other flowers.
Photographer
I searched high and low for our photographer and we hit the jackpot with Agape Wedding Photography. She has a beautifully soft, natural and romantic style of photography and made us feel so at ease throughout the day. I have never felt so beautiful and at ease in front of a camera and this was an element that had me the most nervous on the day. She was 5 or more months pregnant at the time and was an absolute trooper in the crazy South African heat.
Food and Cake
The venue did the catering. We chose a unique South African style menu with a braai (barbecue) theme that included all our favourite side dishes like roast potatoes and a crunchy Asian style cabbage salad. We decided not to have a cake and instead went with desserts and had ice cold shot glasses filled with fruit smoothies served in between the horahs on the dance floor to keep us cool.
At our cocktail hour we had a traditional South African bread cooked on an open fire which is traditionally known as roosterkoek (directly translated as roasted cake) that everyone still raves about. I had had this at a friend’s wedding a few years prior and it was simple and delicious!
Entertainment
Our band, The Jonathan Birin Band, was the entertainment and kept everyone on the dancefloor for the whole evening. The horah’s were the highlight of the evening as there were a number of guests who had never experienced them before. Everyone got involved and we truly had the best time. I made We like to think it had a little something to do with our epic song choices as well.
Favours
We made a little goodie bag for each guest who arrived for the weekend away instead of favours on the table. These included biscotti and a mini bottle of ‘Wild Africa Cream’ which is a traditional South African alcoholic drink served over ice, especially when on safari.
Extra details
Because Dan and I chose to do things in a not so traditional way, it made the whole experience that much more meaningful to us and our guests. Having dinner in a cave with an African drum greeting guests as they arrived created a truly unique setting. Our guests still comment on how epic the entire weekend was when we see them.
Having our entire wedding outdoors was a risk, but one we are so glad that we took. I made our own props for the hora entrance, the maypole for a pop of colour on the dance floor and the groomsmen and Dan changed into t-shirts with their nicknames on the back. We so wanted to do things our way that Dan even wore his t-shirt for our first dance instead of changing back into his suit.
Honeymoon
Due to the travel situation, we have not yet been on honeymoon. When we can travel properly again, we plan to do the breath-taking Garden Route in South Africa and stay at little hidden gems along the way, ending off in Cape Town or going to Thailand together as we have both been separately, as we both long for those amazing smoothies and massages on the beach!
Advice to couples currently planning their wedding
Ultimately, it’s your day and you really should do things the way you want, if a decision is truly important to you, have the tough conversations with family/friends so they understand why. We really did not want a huge guestlist and certain traditions just because it is ‘the done thing’.
We saved a lot of money by not conforming to things that had no meaning for us. Dan and I unfortunately didn’t get a chance to taste the roosterkoek everyone raved about as we were taking photos so I would factor in moving the ceremony earlier if you want to mingle with your guests during cocktail hour.
JESS & DAN’S LITTLE WHITE BOOK
Photography – Agape Wedding Photography
Venue – Monate Lodge
Bride’s dress – Joss Couture
Bride’s accessories – Christy Anne Jewellery
Bridesmaids – Joss Couture
Flowers – The Love Knot
Band – The Jonathan Birin Band
Ketubah & Stationery – Papermoon
Kippot – Hebrewear
If you’re a Jewish or Jew-ish bride-to-be, you’ll want to join Smashing The Glass’ Brides Club. Guided by the world’s number 1 Jewish wedding expert, Karen Cinnamon , Brides Club is the private community for Jewish and Jew-ish brides that removes wedstress and indecision and gives you what you need to plan with confidence during these uncertain times. Join our Brides Club here.
What a beautiful story! The table setting is stunning!