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The Ultimate Jewish Wedding Glossary

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Camila and Benjamin, Tintswalo Atlantic, Cape Town, South Africa

Camila and Ben‘s Jewish wedding | Photo by Nikki van Diermen

One of the most beautiful things about Jewish weddings is how rich they are in ritual. There’s so much meaning and so many centuries of tradition behind just about every step of the day, and there’s something so special about that.

There’s no denying, though, that there’s a lot of lingo to wrap your head around if you’re new to the Jewish wedding world (or even if you’re not!). 

That’s why we created our ultimate Jewish wedding glossary. Whether you’re planning your own Jewish wedding or attending your first one  as a guest, we’ll take you from aufruf to yichud in no time flat. 

Sophie-and-Jonny-Nobu-Portman-Square-London-UK

Sophie and Jonny‘s Jewish wedding | Photo by Liam Collard Photography

AUFRUF: A short ceremony during the Shabbat synagogue service that normally takes place on the Saturday morning before the wedding. The groom (and sometimes the bride) are honoured in front of their community. This is often followed by a small party or lunch.

ARAMAIC: A semitic language related to Hebrew. The traditional ketubah text is in Aramaic.

ASHKENAZI: Jews of Eastern and Central European descent.

BADEKEN: A short but meaningful ceremony where the groom covers the bride’s face with her veil. It occurs just before the actual wedding ceremony and is a custom that derives from the biblical account of Jacob’s first marriage, when he was deceived into marrying the heavily veiled Leah instead of Rachel, his intended bride. The badeken is often emotionally charged as the bride and groom may not have seen each other for 24 hours or longer (as much as 7 days) until this moment.

Jade and Adam, Sopwell House, St Albans, UK
Jade and Adam‘s badeken | Photo by Milda Vasile Photography

BENCHERS / BENCHING: A small booklet containing the Jewish blessings for a meal. Couples will often make personalized benchers for all of their guests to use and then take home as a souvenir.

Shera & Jared, Sheraton Grand Hotel, London, UK

Shera and Jared‘s benchers by Oy Vey Studios | Photo by Devon Shoob

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5 of Our Favorites: Breathtaking Chuppahs We Adore

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Gilda and Shahin‘s Jewish Wedding | Photo by Jessica Claire

Welcome back to “5 of Our Favorites,” where we bring you five stunning Jewish weddings, all curated around a special theme. This week, we’re focusing on one of the most meaningful and beautiful elements of a Jewish wedding: the chuppah.

The chuppah is not just a beautiful structure under which to make things official, but a representation of the couple’s new home and the love they share. From lush floral designs to minimalist elegance to DIY exuberance, these chuppahs are a true reflection of each couple’s style and the spirit of their celebration.

We can’t wait to inspire you with these incredible designs!

colourful-chuppah

Gena and Tony‘s Jewish Wedding | Photo by Lara Hotz 

Gena and Tony’s Extraordinarily Imaginative ‘Color Explosion’ Jewish Wedding at the Sydney Polo Club, NSW, Australia

Get your sunglasses ready, because Gena and Tony’s wedding is a massive rainbow-hued color fest, featuring the most epic DIY chuppah made from tissue paper decorations and a calico roof!

Gena and Tony‘s Jewish Wedding | Photo by Lara Hotz 

There are so many fab details to love, from Gena’s pom pom crown t0 her crochet dress to her supersize bouquet filled with flowers of every possible hue, glitter, ribbons, and pom poms. Then we’ve got bridesmaids dressed in orange carrying big foil heart shaped balloons with tissue paper tassels instead of bouquets. There’s a super cute dog taking centre stage during the ceremony. And 1200 odd colored ribbons used to decorate the barn and chairs. 

Gena and Tony‘s Jewish Wedding | Photo by Lara Hotz 

In Gena’s words,

They say the chuppah represents the home you will build together so it was only fitting that ours would be a colourful space. I just wanted to have something quirky but still traditional and the result was like a sculptural installation and a work of art. We used an assortment of tissue paper honeycomb shapes (including ice creams) as well as tissue paper garlands and a calico roof.

Marina and Gary‘s Jewish Wedding | Photo by Lilian Haidar

Marina and Gary’s Ultra Glam Jewish Wedding with a Mirrored Peony Chuppah at the Metropolitan Club, New York City, USA

Um, WOW. Excuse us as we pick our jaws up off the floor. We are just floored by the magnificent mirrored (!) peony (!!) chuppah in Marina and Gary’s Jewish wedding.

It is just BEYOND, and those hanging peonies suspended from the canopy? Serious, serious #chuppahgoals. Marina says standing under it felt like being in a midsummer night’s dream garden!

Jewish Wedding Metropolitan Club New York City NYC USA_0057

Marina and Gary‘s Jewish Wedding | Photo by Lilian Haidar

Actually, just about everything about this wedding is hardcore #goals. And it’s no wonder, with superstar wedding planner Amy Katz running the show.

Jewish Wedding Metropolitan Club New York City NYC USA_0025

Marina and Gary‘s Jewish Wedding | Photo by Lilian Haidar

This duo had absolutely the quintessential NYC wedding, just bursting with old-school elegance (but with some very cool, very contemporary touches thrown in to keep things from getting stodgy — you won’t want to miss their tequila-infused Mar-Garita cake pops!).

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Jewish Wedding Traditions Explained – The Chuppah

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Chuppah
All imagery by Blake Ezra Photography. This is part 4 of the 8-part Jewish Wedding Traditions Explained series.

The word ‘chuppah’ is used in two ways. Firstly, it’s the Hebrew name of the canopy under which Jewish couples get married. Secondly, it’s also colloquially used as another word for ‘ceremony’. So if someone asks you “When’s the chuppah?” don’t assume they’ve lost all grasp of how to put a sentence together, they’re not asking when the canopy is, but when the ceremony starts.

So what is a chuppah? Why do Jewish couples get married underneath one? What do they do when they get there?

The chuppah, like many elements of a Jewish wedding, is beautifully symbolic. It symbolises the home that the couple will build together in their married life, and is open on all sides like the biblical tent of Abraham and Sarah, signifying that everyone is welcome and that everyone will be treated hospitably.

For readers of this blog, who may be planning their own Jewish wedding, the chuppah is also one of the great opportunities to personalise your ceremony. It can range from a massively decadent, custom-designed piece of floral artistry, to four friends holding poles, upon which sits a custom made quilt or Jewish prayer shawl, called a Tallit.

Chuppah, for Smashing The Glass Jewish Weddings Explained. Chuppah, for Smashing The Glass Jewish Weddings Explained. Chuppah, for Smashing The Glass Jewish Weddings Explained. Continue ReadingContinue Reading

10 Gorgeous Ways to Cover Your Shoulders Under the Chuppah

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Splendid cape cover-up from Ella and Matt’s Jewish Wedding. Image by Barney Walters.
 

What happens when you’ve bought the dress of your dreams, but later realize that you need some sort of coverup for under the chuppah? Maybe your Rabbi requested that your shoulders remain covered during the ceremony, or perhaps there’s a family member that expects certain traditions to be followed through.

Then again, maybe it’s a personal choice, and while you absolutely ADORE the dress you’ve picked out, covering yourself under the chuppah is something that is important to you personally.

I promise you don’t need to run out and return your dress for a long sleeve option—although a long sleeve dress is a great way to have the best of both worlds

A chuppah covering is not a death sentence for your dress! In fact, there are so many ways to use a cover up to your advantage and add a bit of personal flair and style to your bridal look.

Below are my top ten favorite ways and styles to bring modesty and your personality with you under the chuppah. Don’t worry, we’ve got you covered!

Sensational illusion sleeves from Natalie and Edward’s Jewish Wedding. Image by Ran Bergman.
 

1. Illusion Sleeves

Illusion sleeves seem like such an obvious fix, but it’s a classic for a reason. I love how glamourous adding illusion sleeves to your dress can look. It’s such a great idea to make sure that every detail of your dress shines through, while still maintaining a certain modesty. One of our own Smashing the Glass Bride’s looked sexy and gorgeous in TWO Lee Petra Grebenau gowns with stunning illusion embellishments.

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Your Chuppah – Everything You Need To Know

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Everything you need to know about your chuppah
This is a guest post by Lauren Dubell-Beadle, founder of The Chuppah Design Co who created the chuppah above
Image: Babb Photo from Clelia & George’s Jew-ish wedding

{If you are a member of Smashing The Glass’ Brides Club , you can watch Lauren’s video masterclass, ‘Everything You Need To Know About Your Chuppah’ here}

Before the dress, before the center pieces and before the personalized cocktails, your guests will see the symbolic chuppah that you will be married under. If you are like me, you will want that first impression to pack a punch and tell a story at the same time.

Why have a chuppah?

The chuppah goes back a long way and holds a lot of tradition within its simple four-posted structure. Its symbolism is vast, but ultimately the chuppah represents a couples first home that they will build together.

It is open on all four sides to represent the open hospitality the couple will give in their home to their family, friends and acquaintances… fitting more than a handful of your guests under the chuppah would be a challenge!

So the open sides help all your guests feel part of your ceremony. Today many non-Jewish couple choose to include a chuppah in their wedding for its symbolic nature and Jew-ish couples (like my husband and I) also want to have a chuppah, but may come across some challenges finding a rabbi who will willingly marry them or bless them under a chuppah.

US couples may not have the same issue, but if you are lucky enough to find Rabbi Paul Glantz free for your UK (or European) based date then make sure you snap him up! The chuppah was the first ‘Jewish thing’ we knew we wanted at our wedding and our insistence on having one led us to planning a wedding that was truly done ‘our way’. We wanted it to be the start of our meaningful and personal day.

Chuppah ideas
Image: The Image is Found from Michelle & Joseph’s Jewish wedding

Where to get inspiration?

So where do you start with planning your chuppah? Most people make the decision if they want to DIY their chuppah or not before they actually decide what they want… and you can definitely do that… we did.

We knew we wanted to make it ourselves in keeping with the idea of the new couple building their home together and we really didn’t want anyone else’s help for this one part of our day. However, it is important to decide what sort of chuppah will fit in with the overall style of your wedding.

Do you want something simple and traditional (that could be relatively easy to DIY) or do you want a massive eye-catching art installation style that will be pinned and shared all over Instagram after the big day? The latter you may wish to get some help with!

There are three places I’d suggest looking for inspiration at this stage; Smashing the Glass (particularly this post), Pinterest and Instagram the hashtag #chuppah always works a treat!

Whilst you’re scrolling you can begin to think of the style you are heading towards and how you might be able to turn those inspirational images into a reality. Here you might decide if you are DIY-ing or looking for some support from a florist and a rental company or a design service (like me!) for the truly one-off personal chuppah.

book-chuppah
Image: Dave Robbins from Jessie & Craig’s book-themed Jewish wedding

How to turn your vision into reality?

So, you are a newly engaged bride-to-be with a massive wedding Pinterest board and a whole load of new hashtags to follow on Instagram… so how do you turn all these ideas into something for your big day?

Do you go for it and DIY the whole thing or get someone in to do it for you? Both definitely have their merits. If you choose to DIY your chuppah then I’d suggest doing a bit of research before you plan it all out.Continue ReadingContinue Reading