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My Top 5 Dos and Don’ts for a Super-Cool Jewish Wedding

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THE HORA
[ Image: Heather Kincaid ]

This is an article of mine that appeared  in the December issue of  Pulse Magazine  and  received its fair share of love so here it is in it’s online glory!

TOP 5 DO’S FOR A GREAT JEWISH WEDDING

DO  expect to kick up a storm, and have your face glisten with glee (and sweat) during the ‘hora’, the joyous tradition of Jewish dancing. Just be careful not to fall off the chair, and make sure that those with a penchant for booze are not the ones nominated to lift you!

DO  try to experience the pure and sacred side of a Jewish wedding as much as possible, as the spiritual significance is often lost in all the madness of putting it together.

DO  create a Pinterest board to store all your wedding ideas in one place. Pinterest is your best friend when it comes to planning your big day as you can collect beautiful images and wedding design tips and paste them all in one place. Not only useful for you, your boards will also help give guidance to your suppliers. If you don’t want your whole social network to see the details of your wedding before the big day, use one of your private boards for your favourite ideas.

DO  incorporate things into your wedding  that are important to you. eg. A nostalgic song that brings back memories of when you first got together, favours made by you or a family member, table centres incorporating things that are personal to you as a couple, messages from guests woven into your chuppah design – the more individuality you stamp on your wedding, the better.

DO  take time to be calm and in the moment of your day. Hand over the reigns, don’t think about any of the details and enjoy your wedding for what it is: a joyous celebration!
chuppah
[ Image: Mi Belle Inc. ]

TOP 5 DON’TS FOR A GREAT JEWISH WEDDING

DON’T  try to please everyone, meaning all the generations and the rabbi. You cannot and you should not. This is your opportunity to do things as you want and it’s a time to be making decisions without having to justify them or fit expectations. Real friends and family will understand and those that don’t aren’t worth losing any sleep over.

DON’T  expect local guests to adhere to a black tie dress code if you’re getting married in Israel. They will show up in shorts, with a couple of unexpected extra kids in tow. That’s how they roll in the land of milk & honey! And another word of advice if you’re getting married in Israel, expect guests that confirmed attendance not to show up, and guests that were not invited to make an appearance instead. It happens!

DON’T  think that you necessarily need a large bridal party of groomsmen and bridesmaids if that’s not your bag. What you do need is a circle of a few close friends to rely on for support, help, mini-errands and such-like on the day. Have a think on whom you’d like to enlist in the months or weeks leading up to your wedding – close friends and family will feel honoured and be only too happy to help.

DON’T  invite too many people. Fewer and closely connected is better than inviting a cast of unknowns, and makes for a far more meaningful, intimate atmosphere.

DON’T  follow the crowd. Be true to yourself and have the confidence to do things your way, whether that means incorporating something non-traditional into your ceremony, picking a weird theme or wearing a gown so impractical you can barely move. Go for it, this is your day!

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Back home from the Sunshine State!

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Florida  [image:  Boston Public Library  ]

I haven’t posted in over a week as I’ve been abroad in Florida visiting my wonderful brother, sister-in-law and nephew. We took our daughter (now 10 weeks old) with us, and my parents came too. It was terrific to be altogether and to spend quality time as a family in the state of sunshine, oranges and alligators.

We arrived home a couple of hours ago and as lovely as it was to go on holiday, I must say, it is just as delightful to come home (I’m soppy like that).

Now I’m back I have to admit that I’m excited to get going on some really wonderful (and wildly different)  real Jewish weddings. I’ve got Smashing The Glass’s first South African Jewish wedding going online in the next couple of days which I am seriously excited about! It’s a gorgeous chic-meets-rustic affair photographed by the awesome Darren Bester.

Also coming soon, and another first for STG, is a white-themed Bali island Jewish wedding (squeal!) photographed by the incredible Studio Impressions.

And I’ve also got a fancy dress Jewish wedding set in an Arthouse cinema in West Sussex in the pipeline. Does it get better than that? Well yes – when said wedding is seaside-themed, takes place on New Years Eve, and is photographed by the utterly fabulous Martin Beddall,  it absolutely does!

Lastly there’s a fabulous big gay dance party Jewish wedding coming up in the next couple of weeks too. Sneak peaks of all four w-days are below but check back soon for all four glorious weddings in full technicolour. You guys are in for some serious Jewish wedspiration!
Cape Town Wedding
Rustic-Meets-Chic Cape Town Jewish wedding [image: Darren Bester ]

Bali WeddingWhite-themed Bali island Jewish wedding  [image:  Studio Impressions  ]

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Emma & Simon | Intimate and Enchanting Garden Jewish Wedding at Home in London

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28AT HOME LONDON WEDDING 2Denis from Denee Motion Boutique Wedding Cinema, one of our Smashing Suppliers, recently contacted me to share one of his favourite wedding films from 2013 and I had to share it with you. It’s an ‘At Home’ wedding, and is full of warmth and lovely intimate creative touches.

As Emma, the bride says, “When it came to the venue for our wedding, we didn’t even look anywhere else but the family home. I knew I wanted my wedding to be a bit different and so being able to have it at home was the perfect way, and made it even more personal.”

“My mum and I spent a lot of time looking for ideas. She is very creative anyway and likes to add her own personal touches to things. We had a shared Pinterest account so we could both save images of things we found that we liked or could use as inspiration.”

“For the tables, rather than having people’s names printed on cards at their places, we wrote everyones names on fresh ivy leaves and placed them on the napkins which were tied with a ribbon which had the wording ‘live, love, laugh’ on. We were going to just use a coloured ribbon that tied into the colour scheme, but when I found the ribbon with the wording on, I felt it really summed up what I thought was important in life and it became a bit of a theme of the wedding as I had it engraved on my husband’s wedding ring and my mum used the wording in her speech.”

“My mum did a lot of the flowers outside of the marquee herself as she has a flower business and she even integrated pictures of myself and my husband growing up into some of the displays.”

“The wedding itself was a traditional Jewish wedding, but it was lovely again to be able to add personal touches into the ceremony by having our brother’s hold the poles of the chuppah, with one of my husband’s brothers actually taking part in the ceremony, as he is a Rabbi.”

1AT HOME LONDON WEDDING 2 0AT HOME LONDON WEDDING 2

6AT HOME LONDON WEDDING 2

 

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Valeria & Orrie | Spring Theme Jewish Wedding at Lafayette Club, Lake Minnetonka, USA

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Spring theme wedding 15Well I don’t know about you but I’m already getting a little weary of winter and looking forward to sunnier days and warmer weddings. Here’s a cute, gem of a wedding with a strong spring theme to get us in the mood.

As you’d expect from a spring theme wedding, the florals are gorgeous, but what’s more, the creative bride put feathers in her bouquet (LOVE!). We’ve also got birdcages, a big band orchestra, rain boots and paint brushes in the mix! Let’s hand over to our lovely bride,  Valeria for all the details.
Spring theme wedding A
VENUE + LOCATION
Valeria, the Bride: We got married on a beautiful May day in Minnesota, at the Lafayette Club by Lake Minnetonka. Where to get married was the first decision we made. Our families are split between Israel and Minnesota, and we ourselves currently reside in Portland, Maine. We considered Israel, Maine, or a neutral destination wedding, but we chose Minnesota as our location because our immediate families live there, and this made some of the transportation aspect more convenient.

We did not have the time to fly to Minnesota  and physically look at venues, but we were familiar with the Lake Minnetonka area and knew that we can’t go wrong with a pick around this location. Our only “must have” requirements were that there will be room for both ceremony and reception at the same place, and that there will be a view of the lake. Many couples would think it is risky, but we actually chose our venue  based on online photos and reviews! When I saw a photo of the high  vaulted ceiling, the wooden floors and the long  chandeliers, I fell in love with this place and could really imagine our wedding happening there. I contacted the event manager at the location, Brenda, to make sure that there is someone who I can  work  with from a long distance, and she was wonderful in her responsiveness.

We sent our parents to check the venue out and when they told us it was like in the photos, our decision was final. When we actually  saw the Lafayette Club for the first time, thankfully it was exactly as we imagined it!
Spring theme wedding B

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The best Jewish weddings and Jewish wedding ideas

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jewish-wedding_4Looking for some fantastic ideas for your Jewish wedding? Well, in the run-up to my wedding day in April 2013, I was, and I grew increasingly frustrated with the fact that there was nowhere online to find creative, inventive and original ideas for Jewish (or Jew-ish) weddings. So the Smashing The Glass Jewish wedding blog was born with the aim of being chock full of ideas and inspiration for planning unique and creative Jewish weddings.

I curate all the real Jewish weddings that are submitted to the site to bring you only the most creative, unusual and detail-orientated weddings — ones that I’m sure will inspire you, such as this super- chic Jewish wedding, or this one full of loads of DIY loveliness, or these two that meld and embrace both the bride and the groom’s cultures beautifully: a Jewish/Greek wedding and a Jewish/Celtic wedding. I’m in awe of the creativity and originality that are part of every beautiful real Jewish wedding on the site — and I cover everything from city chic Jewish weddings to destination Jewish weddings, country house Jewish weddings, DIY Jewish weddings, garden theme Jewish weddings and of course lots of Israeli weddings. Have a look though them all for lots of inspiration and ideas.

Aside from browsing through the real weddings, perhaps you’re looking for inspiration to create a meaningful and beautiful chuppah? Well the chuppah ideas page has tons and tons of ideas and is constantly updated with gorgeous chuppot. Chuppah There’s also lots more ideas, inspiration and tips in the Ideas for your Jewish Wedding section, everything from ketubot to food & drink ideas to really original guest books, table numbers, name cards, invitations and stationery, and really useful tips and tricks from real brides.

For music ideas, you might also like to check out the top 10 chuppah entrance songs and the best non-traditional versions of ‘Hava Nagila’ london-zoo-wedding-ketubah If you’re marrying out, or marrying in (or anywhere in between for that matter – I call it Jew-ish!) there are loads of real interfaith Jewish weddings to be inspired by, in addition to a wonderful article entitled ‘The diary of a Jewish bride who married out‘ and on top of that two really useful posts by the awesome Michele Schwartz on the subject of converting and interfaith marriage. Also if you are UK based you may want to contact Rabbi Paul Glantz, one of our awesome Smashing Suppliers, who has married many interfaith Jewish couples.

Talking of Smashing Suppliers, let me tell you a little more about them. They are my handpicked selection of the best brands and services the wedding industry has to offer. I select and verify each Smashing Supplier, and can personally vouch for the fact that every one of them has the ability to turn your Jewish wedding day into something truly special. jewish-wedding_5
Finally, I wrote this piece in December 2013 on the The Top 5 Dos and Don’ts for the perfect Jewish wedding for Pulse Magazine, and if you want even more Jewish wedspiration, follow Smashing The Glass on Instagram,  Pinterest, Facebook and Twitter.

And don’t forget, when you do get married, I’d love you to send me your wedding submission afterwards! It’s my awesome readers who ultimately make Smashing The Glass so inspiring and I would absolutely love to hear from you.

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