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Home > An Ultra-Personal DIY Gay Jewish Wedding in the Hamptons, Amagansett, New York, USA

An Ultra-Personal DIY Gay Jewish Wedding in the Hamptons, Amagansett, New York, USA

04/06/2018 by Karen Cinnamon

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We love a good DIY Jewish wedding here at Smashing The Glass, and Adam and Curtis’s intimate day in the Hamptons ticks ALL of our boxes. NYC couple Adam, a senior news producer for CBS News’ 24/7 live streaming network CBSN, and Curtis, an actor and teaching artist currently performing in Angels In America on Broadway, in search of an affordable place to host a wedding weekend, found a gem of a house (with 17 bedrooms!) in Amagansett, in the Hamptons, via VRBO.

Looking at Libby Christensen’s artistic, emotion-filled photos of the day, you’d never guess this wedding was pulled off on a tight budget. But thanks to plenty of help from family and friends, Adam and Curtis were able to pull off an ultra-chic day without spending a fortune.

One of the biggest labors of love was food. Rather than going for a traditional caterer, the pair ordered food from Fresh Direct. The food was delivered to their NYC apartment the day before the wedding, and friends helped them drive all 70 (!) boxes out to the Hamptons so it would be ready on the day.

The couple’s super-devoted wedding party came through to save the day when some inevitable wedding mishaps occurred, too — you’ve got to see what one of the groomswomen did when the cake topper Adam and Curtis had ordered didn’t arrive on time…

The couple calls their wedding a group effort, and the day was really all about honoring their community. At their super-intimate ceremony Adam and Curtis asked their guests to stand around the chuppah, circling them in support and love.

Now over to the grooms, who looked incredibly handsome in their suits from ASOS, Adam ina tweed and Curt in maroon…

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How we met

Adam and Curtis, the grooms: We met on Tinder.

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A Wedding in the Hamptons

We got married in the Hamptons in Amagansett, New York. It was at a private house we found on VRBO and it was perfect. We were looking for an affordable place to host our wedding weekend in New York and the city was out.

We started looking at houses in the Hamptons and lucked out with this one, and we got a lower rental fee because it was the off season. The owners of the 17 bedroom house only allow a couple of weddings there a year and we lucked out securing it. It was perfect as we were able to house our wedding party, families, and some guests at the house (I think 32 of the 100 at the wedding slept there) and created a weekend retreat feel to the celebration.

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DIY

We didn’t use a wedding planner. In order to save costs this was the most DIY wedding we could have possibly put together. We spent hours looking through Amazon for everything from the service wear to decorations. We definitely had a fall Hamptons theme, as the wedding was in October, and the 100 year old house really helped complete the feeling of a rustic fall.

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Rustic Invitations

Again we wanted to save money here, so we opted for a simple two-sided wedding invitation. It had a wood background with some string lights. The front had the details and the back listed out all of the wedding events plus a link to our website where guests could RSVP and find more information, including hotels, things to do, and the registry.

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Haircuts for the Grooms

We’ve been going to the same barber at Rudy’s Barber Shop in New York. We both went for wedding haircuts before Shabbat services the Friday before our wedding. My mom came in from Kansas City and also got her hair done at the same place.

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ASOS Suits

We both ordered our suits from ASOS. We spent quite a lot of time combing through the hundreds of suits they had. Adam chose a tweed suit and Curt chose a deep maroon suit. When we finally found them, we knew they were the perfect suits and matched each other perfectly. We found our ties and tie clips from a local flea market in NYC.

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Shoes from ASOS

The shoes were also purchased online from ASOS.

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Groomspeople

We did something very unique and fitting for us. We each had a best man and best woman as well as a number of groomsmen and women. We left it up to our wedding party to find their own dresses and suits, giving them options of tan, brown, maroon, and navy, and if you look at the color photo of our wedding party it all came together perfectly.

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A Meaningful Chuppah

The chuppah was incredibly special to us. The cloth was made by our cousin Lee Ann, and her daughter was married underneath it. The poles were gifted to us from a couple we met in Israel while traveling there 6 months before our wedding on Honeymoon Israel.

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An Intimate Ceremony

Our ceremony was incredibly intimate. We asked that all of our guests stand around the chuppah to help us create the feeling of our community around us, supporting us. Our rabbi, who we had known for just over a year and who led Curtis’s conversion process, performed the ceremony, and the moment she wrapped us in one tallis our friend bought for us in Israel and said the seven blessings was so intimate and meaningful.

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Sunrise, Sunset

Our wedding party walked down the aisle to a piece from the play War Horse, as Curtis’s time in the play is what led him to the United States from the UK and helped bring us together.

Additionally a number of our friends and wedding party members met Curtis on War Horse. We walked down with our moms to Sunrise, Sunset from Fiddler on the Roof. It was the song my parents walked down the aisle to, and I always knew I wanted to honor them and carry on that tradition.

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Candles 

To save money we scaled back and didn’t buy any real flowers. Instead we only spent about $100 on candles at IKEA that lit the place up beautifully. Curtis hand made all the button holes with fall flowers some he had picked when we were on a fall retreat with the Honeymoon Israel group.

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Our fabulous Photographer

The incredible Libby Christensen was our photographer. She was amazing and snapped every beautiful photo in the moment as it was happening.


Brooklyn Blackout Cake

We bought the Brooklyn Blackout Cake from Two Little Red Hens Bakery on the Upper East Side of NYC. We had ordered a cake topper, but it didn’t come in time; however, Curtis’s mom had gotten us a wedding card with pop-up grooms inside and our dear friend and groomswoman Leah cut it out of the card and added it to the cake!

The rest of the catering came from Fresh Direct! Yes, that’s right: Fresh Direct catering. It was all delivered to our apartment in 70 boxes Saturday morning before our Sunday wedding, and we along with four other friends’ cars drove it all the way out to the Hamptons. We hired a couple of incredible cater waiters who warmed everything up and displayed it beautifully to serve our wedding party buffet-style.

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Music by a Friend

We again sourced our friends and hired our good friend at a very reasonable rate to DJ our wedding! She immediately agreed to get the party going at our wedding and kept it going all night.

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Gifts for the Wedding Party 

We didn’t have favors as such, but we bought gifts for each member of our wedding party. My best man and groomsman had money clips with a bicycle and dinosaur engraved on. Each of my groomswomen was given a bracelet with a heart charm in either bronze, silver, gold, or copper. Handing them out as we sipped champagne just before the wedding started was one of the most emotional and incredible experiences of my life.

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A Group effort

Our whole wedding was a group effort. Each member of our wedding party (and their partners) helped to make our ideas and visions come to fruition.

We hung paper lanterns in the dance area, along with string lights. We also bought huge white balloons that the kids enjoyed throwing around and we held for some photos during an incredible sunset.

All of the items involved in the ceremony, including the carafe to hold the kiddush wine, were gifted by someone important to us. My grandma sent the carafe to hold the kiddush wine with my mom from the UK. My mom decided to check she’d removed the price tag from underneath, twenty minutes before the wedding started. Little did she know that there was already wine inside. She also happened to be wearing a white jacket. Needless to say, I had to call on the services of my groomswomen and a whole bottle of OxyClean to save her outfit and the day!

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Advice to couples currently planning their wedding

I’m not sure there is any way to avoid the inevitable stress of throwing a wedding. Our whole approach was to do as much ourselves as possible, to make sure it felt like us and was what we wanted.

We didn’t want a planner or a venue doing the stock wedding things and we definitely didn’t want to worry about seat backs and center pieces. We did have a trusty binder with a multitude of lists in it! That was the only way I could keep track of anything.

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Adam & Curtis’ little white book

Photography – Libby Christensen
Venue – found on VRBO
Grooms’ suits and shoes – Asos
Grooming – barber at Rudy’s Barber Shop
Catering – Fresh Direct
Cake – Two Little Red Hens Bakery
Cake Topper – Etch A Sketch Art
Candles – IKEA

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Filed Under: Outdoor, Real Jewish Weddings, Jewish Budget Weddings, Jewish DIY Weddings, Jewish Gay Weddings Tagged With: Amazon, Ikea, Libby Christensen Photography, New York Jewish Wedding, USA, ASOS, Online dating success story

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