Here at Team STG, we have been absolutely loving all of the reimagined pandemic weddings we’ve been seeing, Though it’s no easy feat – emotionally or logistically – to change tack when you’re deep in the midst of planning the day of your dreams, so many amazing couples are rocking it each and every day.
Like Smashing The Glass Brides Club member Danielle, a designer at Facebook, and Eric, an attorney. They had originally planned a big Jewish wedding in Washington, DC – but then COVID intervened. Once it became clear their initial plans were a no-go, the pair decided they still wanted to move things forward, and chose to embrace the opportunity to plan a different kind of wedding. Different, but no less beautiful or joyous – photographer Eli Turner’s incredible imagery is proof of that.
Choosing the groom’s parents’ backyard as their venue, Danielle and Eric leaned into the intimacy that comes hand in hand with marrying in front of just 14 of your nearest and dearest. They opted not to stream their celebration on Zoom (though they did have videographer Tom Bowen of Bowen Films on hand to record a video they could share with friends and family unable to attend), instead letting the tight-knit group set the stage for what became the couple’s favorite part of the wedding: their ultra-personal vows, which Danielle says they never would’ve shared in front of their original 230-person guest list. We’re also in love with the couple’s wonderful nature-inspired ketubah by Smashing The Glass Recommended Vendor The Ketubah.
Danielle and Eric also made an effort to replace other elements that they felt they were “losing” from their big wedding with new features that excited them. The two are both big fans of the band Phish, and while they’d originally deemed the band’s music too quirky to impose on their guest list, with the attendees pared down to just family they opted to go full on by booking a Phish tribute band to perform!
We’ll let the bride – who looked ravishing in Pronovias (yes, the same gown she’d picked out for the big bash) – fill you in on the rest…
adrotate banner=”136″
How We Met
Danielle, the bride: We met at a Great Gatsby themed party during college, when I was a sophomore and Eric was a senior. I had a feather in her hair and Eric was wearing a full suit, which is not your regular college attire. We spent the whole night talking and by the end of the party had exchanged numbers. Eric liked that I was in the art school and very creative. I was drawn to Eric’s humor and wit.
Hotel to Backyard
When we got to wedding planning, we knew we wanted a big Jewish wedding full of tradition and spirit. Arrangements were made at the Intercontinental on the Wharf in Washington, DC for the reception and at the District Pier for the ceremony on July 2, 2020. Around 230 guests were expected. Attire was set to be black tie optional. Danielle’s childhood rabbi who had married her parents was going to officiate. All the details were falling into place as March rolled around. Then, coronavirus put the world on pause.
Once we knew that the virus was definitely going to impact our wedding plans, we had numerous hard conversations about what to do. Through this we realized that we still wanted to get married if it were possible to have our immediate family present.
We changed our venue to Eric’s parents’ backyard, rented an RV for Danielle’s parents’ accommodations, dropped the formal attire, and went full steam ahead on planning wedding number 2. We did decide if we did not feel satisfied by this small wedding, we would do a celebration with all our guests once it was safe.
On July 2, we got married surrounded by 14 family members and a handful of extended family members and socially distanced friends. The immediate family celebrated after with dinner and dancing. While the guest list was small, the celebration had as much love, spirit, and energy as the original larger wedding. We all escaped reality and Covid-19 for the day. It was never what we expected our wedding to be, but now we could not imagine it any other way.
The wedding was everything we could have hoped for, so we are not planning a wedding in 2021. Right now we’re just enjoying being newlyweds.
adrotate banner=”136″
What ‘Smashing The Glass Brides Club’ Did For Us
I found the STG community really supportive particularly during such a tumultuous time to be planning a wedding. We were all navigating what do together. My sister literally called it my support network.
We also got our ketubah from STG vendor Steph Caplan from The Ketubah.
Embracing Intimacy
We decided to fully embrace the intimacy of our small wedding. There was a new beauty to only being surrounded by close family and friends. For these reasons we chose not to stream it on Zoom, but did hire a videographer to share it later. This set the stage for one of our favorite parts of the wedding, which was the vows. We could not have shared such personal feelings and memories with our originally planned larger wedding. We also chose to keep the dinner and party afterwards to just our immediate families, so we could truly dance and celebrate. Our family all took precautions to quarantine in the weeks prior.
We tried to replace the elements that we felt we were “losing” from our big wedding with new features that excited us. Since we are both big fans of the band Phish, we incorporated their music into the day. We may not have been able to subject 200+ people to our quirky music choices, but we definitely could with just our family!
A local Phish tribute band called Uncle Ebenezer played music for the ceremony and reception. After months without concerts, it was wonderful to have live music. They transformed what could have been a staid event into a true party. Instead of a ballroom first dance, we learned a fun dance that Phish does on trampolines to the song You Enjoy Myself. Afterwards, the trampolines became part of our dance party as everyone wanted to test their bouncy dance moves.
On a more romantic note, Eric played my favorite Phish song on the piano as my parents walked me down the aisle. Even our rabbi had a Phish story. By coincidence, a month prior to the Covid-19 breakout we met him at a Phish show in Mexico. We quickly figured out that his congregation was in Eric’s small hometown. When Danielle’s childhood rabbi was not able to travel to the wedding, we knew just who to call.
Invitations
I worked for weeks painting a watercolor scene of our wedding venue on the water for our wedding invitations. It ultimately never got printed and our small wedding of our immediate family did not need any invitations.
Hair + Make-up
While I felt comfortable with a hairstylist, I did not feel comfortable with a makeup artist. I ended up working with Cathy Kades Makeup, a DC based makeup artist, who virtually taught me how to create my desired wedding look. She advised me what to buy and did a demo over Zoom that I recorded. The month leading up to the wedding, I practiced my wedding makeup numerous times and sent Cathy photos to consult. I even learned how to put on fake eyelashes! I am so happy I went through this process, so that I could still have the glow of professional makeup for the wedding.
My hair stylist was Leah Dempsey who I was lucky enough to book the week of the wedding. She styled my hair with loose waves and a few front pieces pulled back. I was inspired by the backyard-garden feel of the wedding and had her put flowers in my hair to finish off the look.
A Pronovias Dress
When I started to look for dresses, I went to every store looking for the Alcyone by Pronovias. When I eventually tried it on, it was just as stunning in person as online. The dress is crepe with lace applique along the bodice that cascades down the skirt. The back has a keyhole with buttons that down the skirt until the start of the train.
Accessories
I wore the veil that my sister wore, which is her husband’s family’s heirloom. Her mother-in-law has become family, so it was touching that she shared it with me.
adrotate banner=”136″
Shoes
I wore lacey white shoes with a satin wedge heel that were very bridal from Bella Belle. For the reception, my sister and I changed into high heeled Nike sneakers so that we could really dance. This was necessary!
The handsome groom
Eric, the groom: When we decided on a backyard wedding, I decided to use it as an excuse to dress a bit less formally. I’m a big fan of Converse, so I bought an all-white pair of Converse to use as my starting point. Once that purchase was made, I worked with a local store, Beginnings Bleus, to style the rest of the outfit.
I had initially suggested an all-white suit, which the stylist thought might be a bit overkill. He ended up finding a great off-white linen suit from Theory complemented by a white Theory linen shirt, which ended up being the first and only outfit I tried on. It was a bit bold, but I really liked how it turned out; John Lennon/ABBA vibes!
Bridesmaids
Danielle, the bride: The original wedding would have had 4 bridesmaids wearing various shades of dusty blue to compliment the waterside venue. Since this new version of the wedding was so small, I technically did not have any bridesmaids. Instead, my mom and sister wore long pink dresses, which matched my bouquet and popped against the surrounding greenery. Two of my original bridesmaids were able to sign our ketubah, which was a meaningful way to still have them part of the day.
Our original wedding was supposed to start with a badeken and tisch. We both love the excitement and spirituality of these traditions, so we were challenged with how to adapt them for a much smaller crowd. We had to get a little creative. We invited a small handful of local close friends and extended family to come and socially distance. Danielle had a short badekan virtually connecting with loved ones who could not be there and Eric held his own abridge virtual tisch with friends from afar.
As per tradition, Eric danced over Danielle to check that she was the right bride. Then, we all came together for a joint tisch of singing, heckling, toasting, signing the ketubah, and our mothers smashing a plate. Danielle’s mother prepared a touching presentation with candlesticks for us to light every Shabbat along with blessings from each of our family friends who were not able to be physically present.
From the tisch, we went right into the ceremony. Eric played Danielle’s favorite song on the piano as she walked down the aisle. The ceremony felt extra emotional as we had all gone through so much since the start of the pandemic. It was cathartic to celebrate something good. Our rabbi, Rabbi Strom, was wonderful and spoke about how it was fate that we had met him just before the pandemic, so that he could marry us. We shared very personal vows because we had such an intimate audience.
Despite the vast majority of our extended family not being there, their presence was felt. My aunt sent my great great grandfather’s kiddush cup which had traveled with him from Wyszkow, Poland to Mexico to Costa Rica to Cuba and eventually to the United States. All of my first cousins have used this kiddush cup in their ceremony. My parents even surprised us and had my cousin who has a wonderful voice record a video singing the sheva bracha.
Ketubah
We got our ketubah from STG vendor Steph Caplan of The Ketubah. She creates gorgeous Hebrew calligraphy.
Chuppah
While our original wedding would have had a large floral pergola styled chuppah, this chuppah was 4 simple bamboo poles that tied to Eric’s grandfather’s tallit. The ceremony began with each of our 4 siblings holding a pole of the chuppah. Once our parents walked us down the aisle, they traded places with our siblings, so that they were holding each of the poles for the remainder of the ceremony. It was meaningful to have our siblings and then our parents hold the chuppah, which is a symbol of us coming together to create a new home.
Flowers
The talented Kelly Skaggs did our florals and rentals for the wedding. When we decided to have the wedding at my mother-in-law’s home, she did not want us to feel like we were settling. She took it upon herself to transform her backyard. First, her husband and her added some extra landscaping to the backyard. Then, she hired Kelly Skaggs, a local freelance floral designer. From my vibrant natural bouquet, to the farm tables, to the stunning china rentals, Kelly brought to life a beautiful garden wedding.
adrotate banner=”136″
Photographer and videographer
We were able to use our originally hired photographer and videographer. We were very lucky they agreed to come to New York to capture this new event.
Our photographer Eli Turner captured the candid moments, the private moments, and mostly the emotion of the day. Tom Bowen of Bowen Films lended his talent, so that we could have a video to share with our guests who could not physically be there.
Food and Cake
Our wedding cake was from Sugar Hi, a local bakery in Eric’s town. The cake was a combination of our favorite flavors, the bottom tier was chocolate with peanut butter icing and the top tier was vanilla with cookies and cream icing. The cake was topped with our wedding logo and flowers.
The food was from a local shop in Eric’s town called La Mer Seafood. We designed the whole menu around Coronavirus, so that we would not need to share platters or use a refrigerator, which did not have a lot of space as it was brimming stocked up food for the pandemic.
Hors d’oeuvres were gazpacho shooters, vegetarian quesadillas, artichoke bottoms, and tuna bites. For the main meal we started with a Greek salad followed by an entree of poached salmon with quinoa pilaf and broccoli rabe.
Since the wedding was casual, we also ordered a bunch of pizza because who doesn’t want pizza?
Entertainment
A local Phish tribute band called Uncle Ebenezer played music for the ceremony and reception. After months without concerts, it was wonderful to have live music. They transformed what could have been a staid event into a true party. We all danced all night long.
Favors
À la Covid-19 we had custom hand sanitizers and masks with our wedding logo. My mother in law surprised us.
Extra details – a village affair
Something that was unexpectedly endearing about our small wedding was that many family members, friends, neighbors, and nearly the whole town of Armonk pitched in. A family lent us the chuppah that her son had used for his wedding. A neighbor with a drone captured aerial footage of our celebration. We catered the meal, bought Eric’s suit, and framed our ketubah all at shops on the main street of Eric’s town which his family has frequented for years.
My mother-in-law found Kelly Skaggs, a local freelance floral designer, who created the flowers and ordered the country tables, chairs, and place settings. Family friends in the area drove by prior to the ceremony for a drive-by parade. Even the local fire department drove by. It truly took a village to pull off this wedding.
Honeymoon
While we could not go far, we went to Vermont for a week. We stayed at a cabin on a beautiful mountain surrounded by nature. We spent our time enjoying the outdoors and relaxing.
adrotate banner=”136″
Advice to couples currently planning their wedding
For Coronavirus brides:
- If you are open to the microwedding, you should do it! It felt like a true wedding and was just as special as the big wedding would have been.
- Make this wedding the real deal. Invest and put thought into the details that you cared about for your larger wedding, whether that means wearing your original wedding dress or still doing a first dance. You can still have another wedding in 2021 if you feel like you were missing your friends and family.
- You can have a party with few people! Hire a local band, deejay, or keep your originally planned wedding music. The 14 of us danced the night away.
- Replace the things you feel like you are missing out on from your big wedding, with new things that excite you. Things that may have been too difficult or expensive to pull off when there were a hundred plus guests involved, may now work.
- Write down the schedule of the day (ie: when deliveries are coming, time for photos, ceremony start time, etc.) and task someone with the job of being on top of it. I was the one responsible for keeping track of time on my wedding day, which was stressful early in the day.
- Lean on family and friends to help pull together this reimagined wedding. For example, we did our first look in a neighbors backyard because they have a beautiful garden.
DANIELLE & ERIC’S LITTLE WHITE BOOK
Photography – Eli Turner
Videography – Bowen Films
Ketubah – The Ketubah {offers 10% discount to all members of Smashing The Glass’s Brides Club}
Venue – Groom’s parent’s backyard
Bride’s dress – Pronovias
Bride’s shoes – Bella Belle – Pamela Wedges
Groom’s attire – Beginnings Bleus
Makeup – Makeup consulting by Cathy Kades Makeup (I did it myself), Leah Dempsey
Flowers & rentals – Kelly Skaggs
Band – Uncle Ebenezer
Catering – La Mer Seafood
Cake – Sugar Hi
Rabbi – Rabbi Strom
If you’re a Jewish or Jew-ish bride-to-be, you’ll want to join Smashing The Glass’ Brides Club. Guided by the world’s number 1 Jewish wedding expert, Karen Cinnamon, Brides Club is the private community for Jewish and Jew-ish brides that removes wedstress and indecision and gives you what you need to plan with confidence during these uncertain times. Join our Brides Club here.
