Planning a Jewish wedding can be tricky. Planning an interfaith Jewish wedding? Even trickier. That’s why I’m so happy to share my latest Facebook Live all about how to plan your perfect celebration, one that combines your two backgrounds in a unique way that’s totally, 100% you.
On this Live, I spoke with Rabbi Robyn Frisch and Nicole Wasilus of 18Doors, a wonderful organization dedicated to empowering interfaith couples and families to engage in Jewish life. No one knows more about interfaith Jewish weddings than these two, and I learned so much from speaking with them.
If you’re in the midst of planning your own interfaith celebration, or suspect you might be soon, you can’t do any better than to watch the recording of this fantastic session – and for easy browsing, I’ve recapped the highlights for you below.
There’s so much information to be gleaned from this Live, but if you’ve got a particular question that isn’t answered, please don’t hesitate to reach out to the wonderful 18Doors team – they’ve got 26 rabbinic fellow spread throughout US and Canada, and they’d love to help you out however they can, wherever you are in the world. 18 Doors’ sole mission is to help interfaith Jewish couples and families, so this is really what they’re here for!
Read on for some of Rabbi Robyn and Nicole’s interfaith wedding wisdom…
Rabbi Robyn and Nicole emphasized that, at the very beginning of wedding planning, it’s important to start by talking to your partner and hearing what they have to say. You should do this before you reach out to officiants, and before you start involving your families.
What exactly might you want to discuss? Consider talking through the following:
- Which traditions from your background are important to you, and are there any that aren’t?
- Is there anything about your partner’s tradition that you’d especially like to include, or that would make you uncomfortable to include?
- Is there anything you especially liked or didn’t like from other weddings you’ve attended?
- Are there any important people you’d like to honor in your wedding? What are some ways you might like to do that?
Rabbi Robyn and Nicole also recommend checking out Anita Diamant’s The Jewish Wedding Now for reference and ideas.
Above all, it’s important to start having these conversations early, and to keep communication open throughout the planning process.