Photo by Claudine Hartzel
How are you doing? If the answer is “not so great,” you’re not alone. The past three weeks have seen some of the darkest days the Jewish community has experienced in most of our lifetimes, and it can feel like there’s no end in sight.
Between grieving the incomprehensible brutality and loss of life on October 7, the overwhelming silence from friends and the world at large in the days following, and now, blatant Jew hate beyond what many of us thought was possible in the 21st century, we’ve all been through a lot.
I know it’s easy to minimize what those of us outside of Israel, who don’t have friends or family who’ve been killed or taken hostage, are experiencing, but the reality is that this conflict is taking its toll on all of us.
And it’s essential to make sure we’re doing what it takes to sustain our strength so we have the energy to keep supporting our loved ones, speaking out for Jews and Israel, and bringing much-needed Jewish joy into the world.
If you’re struggling, I’m sharing some Jewish self-care tips that I hope will help you take back control and give you the support you need to stay empowered and avoid burning out during this undeniably tough time.
Limit your news intake
This is one of the hardest but most important tips. I know the urge to keep doomscrolling is so strong right now, but past a certain point the urge to be constantly up-to-date can do more harm than good.
Consuming the steady drip of bad news – not to mention the excess of screen time that comes with it – isn’t good for our mental health, and while keeping on top of minute-by-minute updates might help us feel more in control, that’s just an illusion.
So when you’re starting to feel overwhelmed, switch off your phone for half an hour (or whatever period of time makes sense for you).
Keep your social media safe
I’m giving social media its own category because, sadly, the apps we used to turn to for relaxation and distraction have all too often been overtaken by Jew hate and misinformation. Now more than ever, it’s so important to curate your feed.
Unfollow accounts that are making you feel unsafe – and if you can’t handle your feeds being flooded with content about the war, consider muting accounts who are posting a lot about it for now, even if you support their work and messaging.
If you’re posting about Israel and Jew hate on your own accounts right now, consider turning comments off your posts – or, if you leave them open, just don’t read them. There are so many comment trolls spewing antisemitism on Jewish and pro-Israel accounts.
Get outside
While you’re on that news break, try to get outside for some fresh air. A (screen-free!) walk around your neighborhood can do wonders for your state of well-being – and if you’re able to really get out and spend some time in nature, even better.
Give back
At a time when many of us are feeling so powerless, focusing on ways we can make a difference is so important. One way to do that is by giving to others, either by giving tzedakah or volunteering your time.
There are plenty of Israel-related causes to donate to – and depending on where you are, there may be local opportunities to help send supplies to Israel or to fundraise. And if there are rallies in support of Israel where you live, attending one in person is also a great thing to do.
That said, other causes unrelated to Israel still need support right now, so if there’s something you can do to make a difference in your local community – whether it’s helping out at a food pantry, visiting isolated seniors, or whatever else is a good fit – don’t feel like these activities are any less important right now!
Get involved with Jewish community
Spending time with other Jews is so important right now. That can mean going to shul on Shabbat, talking on the phone with a friend, or inviting people to Friday night dinner.
If you’re missing Jewish community in your life right now – or if you just feel like making more Jewish friends – our private Jewish community, Smashing Life, is a safe, non-judgmental 24/7 community of Jewish women who get the challenges and joys of living a Jewish life in a non-Jewish world.
Lean into Shabbat
Shabbat is such an incredible opportunity to switch off and be fully present with loved ones (or yourself!). Switch off your phone, prepare a nice meal, light candles, read a book, take a nap, read the weekly parshah or engage with Jewish prayer – there are so many ways to use Shabbat to rest and refresh yourself at the end of a hard week like the ones we’re all living through right now.
Jewish joy through journaling
My Jewish Joy Journal, a 6-month gratitude journal based on Jewish values, has gotten me through some tough times over the past couple of years – and I’ve found it so helpful in processing everything I’ve been feeling since October 7.
It features reflections, quotes, Shabbat prompts and recipes that will fill your life with daily joy, purpose, and nourishing Jewish values, in good times and bad. If you don’t have a Jewish Joy Journal of your own yet, get yours here.
Surround yourself with Jewish media
Read a Jewish book, listen to a Jewish podcast, watch an Israeli movie or TV show, or put on some uplifting Jewish music – if you’re looking for ideas, I’ve put together a Jewish Pride Playlist you can listen to on Spotify!
Treat yourself by supporting Israeli and Jewish-owned businesses
It might feel frivolous, but a little treat can be a great pick-me-up – and if you buy from an Israeli or Jewish-owned business, you can feel good about the impact your purchase is making.
Don’t be afraid to seek professional help if you need it
This is an incredibly challenging time, and if you’re already doing lots of self-care and still struggling there is no shame whatsoever in seeking professional help. If you’re not doing ok right now, let your loved ones know, and if it’s an option for you, consider seeing a therapist. At least one member of Team STG has upped their anxiety meds since the war broke out – so please know that if you need some extra help right now, you’re not alone.
