We’re totally and completely obsessed with the fabulous Jewish wedding of Miri, an ex-performer-turned-singing-teacher, and Danny, who works in financial risk – and not just because they worked with some of our very favorite Smashing The Glass Recommended Vendors!
These two planned a wedding inspired by two of their biggest loves (aside from each other, of course!): music, and especially musical theatre; and football team Tottenham Hotspurs! While this might seem like an eclectic combo, Miri and Danny pulled it off to perfection – they even got their wonderful stationers, Smashing The Glass Recommended Vendor Big Day Designs, to design them a custom wedding logo based on the Spurs emblem of a cockerel balancing on a football – only instead of a cockerel, there was a music note!
Music being a big deal, the band was the very first thing these two booked – they slotted everything else in around it! Who did they choose? None other than Smashing The Glass Recommended Vendor XS Showband! In Miri’s words, “Not only did XS tick all of the boxes, but they were so flexible and helpful with all the extras and personal touches I had arranged with friends, colleagues and pupils singing throughout the day – as well as my own surprise number that I performed!”
As always, we’re in love with the luminous, emotion-packed photos from Smashing The Glass Recommended Vendor Claudine Hartzel Photography – Claudine’s visual storytelling skills are second to none, and scrolling through her beautiful images we feel as if we were right there with Miri and Danny.
Smashing The Glass Recommended Vendor Fews Marquees – who the couple knew they wanted to work with even before they settled on their venue – just happened to be the chosen marquee supplier for Deene Park, where Miri and Danny eventually opted to make it official. And they did SUCH a fabulous job.
Finally, how gorgeous is Miri’s Nicole Milano gown, purchased for 50% off(!) as a sample from beloved Smashing The Glass Recommended Vendor Mirror Mirror in Angel? Needless to say, the fab team at Mirror Mirror perfectly customized the dress to Miri’s every specification.
There’s so much more we could say about this exquisite day, but we’ll let the bride tell you the rest…
How We Met
Miri, the bride: We met on J-Swipe; amused that I must have ‘completed’ all the single Nice Jewish Boys in North West London, I extended my location settings to Paris. No, this wasn’t a long-distance Parisian courtship. I immediately realised that this would create more hurdles, rather than less. So I gave up on France. Instead, I lowered the age range on my dating profile (by two and a half years). Turns out, I hadn’t actually completed all the NJBs after all. #Danny
His words regarding our first meeting :
“Miri greeted me with a hug that was befitting of a long lost friend and the first half an hour or so was somewhat of a sensory overload, as I took in both how beautiful Miri looked and how quickly she spoke.”
A COVID-Safe Venue
My parents are retired GPs and were always determined to make the wedding as Covid-safe as possible – with a marquee and as much outdoors as a UK wedding could allow. We had decided that, providing we weren’t in lockdown, we would be getting married on the 8th of August – whatever the guest allowance. Last September, we made an initial plan to get married in my university gardens at Sidney Sussex College, Cambridge; Sidney were very flexible as it’s not their main income. They weren’t even asking for a deposit.
I wanted to avoid falling-in-love with big venues and subsequently going on a rollercoaster of different feelings when we weren’t sure exactly what our wedding could look like. However, we couldn’t visit Sidney gardens to measure the ground whilst the university was closed to the public and when I could, we realised that the trees were somewhat taller now than when I had graduated……meaning we wouldn’t be able to fit in as big a marquee as we needed – especially not whilst adhering to social-distancing.
Cue Boris’ announcement that there was a glimmer of hope that weddings may be returning to full capacity and we had to find a new venue with 4 months to go. There weren’t many outdoor venues that could accommodate a big enough bespoke marquee and even fewer when we took into account our choice of band. For us (me especially), the music was the centrepiece and most outdoor venues in London won’t allow more than a 5-piece band because of noise-constraints.
Rather serendipitously, three different people/suppliers had independently suggested Deene Park Weddings as the perfect location for us. It’s a purely bespoke outdoor venue, since the family still live in the house (‘house’/‘manor’/‘mansion’ – take your pick!)
Georgina Guest – the new (then) wedding coordinator at Deene with the most superlative list of experience a bride could ask for – was extremely excited at the idea of a Jewish wedding, as were the proprietors. Alas, the venue was already booked for a car show on our chosen date. This felt all the more affecting when we realised that Deene had just gone into exclusive partnership with none other than our chosen marquee company – Fews Marquees. However, Georgina is known for moving mountains. And move mountains she did.
G (as I affectionately call her) managed to relocate the Audi car show to the other side of the property and to secure us access to the family entrance. We didn’t cross paths with Audi even for a second – (a slight disappointment in reality – I thought I might be able to snag a bridal discount).
Not only did we secure the perfect venue – only 1 hour 30 from NW London – but we also landed the best combination of suppliers as a result. #GorgeGeorge
Theme
A single colour felt too constrained for indecisive little me – so we had three! Rose gold, gold and mint green – with sparkles. The bridespeople wore a combination of all of the above. Rather than a ‘theme’ as such, I wanted to make sure the wedding reflected both Danny and my own personalities and quirks. (This is all the more tricky when the groom is opting out of the majority of the planning process…)
I’m rather into glitz, glam and theatre, whereas Danny doesn’t like anything too ostentatious. So the goal was to find a balance between the two for most, if not all, aspects of the day. For example – our dress code was ‘Black Tie Optional’ with the caveat that Danny would be wearing a suit but the bridal party would be going full-out- thus ladies (and men) should feel comfortable to join if they so wished!
Invitations / stationery
We used Big Day Designs. As Spurs fans, having Susan from Big Day show us Ledley King’s wedding invite in our zoom chat was a major highlight – for the groom and mother of the bride especially. They even designed us our own wedding trademark ‘logo’ for the invite to combine Musical Theatre and Tottenham Hotspur respectively. It was based on the Spurs emblem of a cockerel balancing on a football. Only, instead of a cockerel – there was a music note. It was perfect – ingenious, inclusive and extremely pretty!!
Hair + Make-up
I spent hours trawling through instagram looking for the right people for this as I’m quite particular when it comes to my hair and makeup. I was looked after by Stacey Lacey MUA & Love Hair by Lou . The rest of my bridal party had a combination of Stacey, Lou and another talented local MUA Aimee Garner MUA . I could not have been happier with the total artistry of all of them! Everyone felt a million dollars which was all I wanted. (And I looked pretty good too).
A Mirror Mirror Dress
I found my dress at Mirror Mirror in Angel. This was the third shop I had gone to and although everyone had been so helpful – I knew that I wanted to get my dress here from the moment I walked in.
Actually, from the moment before. I met another bride at the coffee shop which neighbours Mirror Mirror – she gave the most glowing review and gushed about how supportive they were during C-times. Plus – it did help that I found a dress at Mirror Mirror that ticked all of my boxes. In all honesty, I was a little confused by the time it got to trying on The One I bought and didn’t get ‘the feeling’ that people seem to focus on.
I wanted to try and find the dress before another possible lockdown (which did come!) and this meant that I had tried on very many frocks in the space of about ten days. I knew that I wanted off-the-shoulder/strapless, princess cut and lots of shimmer. I’d tried on so many but none that had it all.
Then in Mirror Mirror, I found a Nicole Milano which had everything and was a sample with 50 percent off – so we bought it there and then. Although I spent many hours thereafter worrying (unnecessarily) that I had made a rash decision – it was really beautiful and rather perfect. Mirror Mirror customised it to my every specification. According to one of my students, this was ‘the most “Miri” dress possible’. I do think that one can drive oneself a little crazy overanalysing!
Plus- the fifty percent off meant that I could more more easily justify the crazy price-tag attached to my shoes. Special to mention must go to Meb from Mirror Mirror who is an absolute rockstar and went above and beyond. She has had so many Jewish Brides that she was able to actually teach me how to negotiate the circling and Simcha dancing with a dress the size of Europe in-tow. #HipHipHoraForMeb
Accessories
When I informed my bridespeople and my mother (and my fiancé) that I was planning on wearing a tiara, they were quite sceptical. Admittedly, this may have been because I was initially looking at some designs which were a tad dramatic and might have been a little much alongside the chosen frock, even for me! Thankfully, one of my bridesmaids introduced me to the fantastic Gillian Million in Teddington, Surrey. She designed a bespoke tiara which was both adequately sparkly and exquisitely lightweight, befitting of a Tinkerbell (one of our table names…). Gillian also made earrings to match.
At Mirror Mirror, I chose a sheer glittering veil from Dolecka Bridal. Despite its description, the veil was subtle and complimented the dress perfectly.
Shoes
The shoes were the most extravagant purchase, care of Christian Louboutin. They were Kate Strass 85s with pink-tinged crystals covering the entirety of the pump and heel. I actually had a slight panic attack and crisis of conscience after buying them, especially since shoes are not usually an item that I personally focus on. Not to mention the fact that they were somewhat hidden under about 77 layers of dress.
However, I’m now so pleased that we splurged (overdraft aside). The Nicole Milano dress will be wrapped up in a box and perhaps taken out in thirty or so years from now to share with future offspring. But the shoes can adorn my feet (hopefully painlessly) for years and celebrations to come. Needless to say, I made sure to lift up the dress to display the ‘Loubs’ on the dance floor and for many a Claudine snap.
The handsome groom
Danny wore an ‘airforce blue’ suit from Reiss. The groom’s party ties were supposed to be gold, rose gold and mint green to match the bridespeople and colour scheme. However Danny – being colour blind- bought a tie that wasn’t so much gold as bright yellow….but this was typically ‘Danny’ and so beautifully appropriate. He looked like the poster boy for Jswipe— the Nice Jewish Prince Charming of my girlish dreams.
Bridesmaids
I had seven ‘bridespeople’ – six ladies and one gentleman. Heartbreakingly, there were only six on the day, since my sister was unable to journey from Singapore, thanks to Covid. The bridal party attire was in-keeping with the colour scheme and the sparkles: two in rose gold, two in gold and two in mint green. All in sequins.
I wanted my bridesmaids to be able to wear a style that suited them all individually. Thus, we searched high and low and bought all the girls a full-length gown from a different shop or site. Three of my bridesmaids had recently given birth, so finding a dress that was breast-feeding-friendly was a priority! One bridesmaid ended up wearing a stunning mint-green Sari which she borrowed from her family 🙂
The Bridesman wore a grey suit from Next. Unfortunately, I couldn’t find a sequin waistcoat and tie that didn’t make him look like he was going to pull rabbit out of a hat… so I bought him a mint green satin waistcoat, tie and pocket-square set from Fruugo . The bridesmaids found inexpensive but rather gorgeous hair combs from Amazon.
Ceremony
We asked guests to contribute both with spoken and sung words. Following in the footsteps of many modern Jewish couples, we chose to have seven friends recite seven secular adaptations of the traditional Sheva Brachot (some written specially by the friends themselves) before Rabbi Josh chanted the Hebrew version. This was wonderful; moving, funny and personal. It was also a lovely way to include even more special guests in the ceremony.
Another highlight was the choir of thirty six, made up of performer friends of mine from the West End and also my pupils who are in their 2nd and 3rd year of training at Emil Dale Academy. They sang an arrangement of ‘I Say A Little Prayer’ by Burt Bacharach and Hal David – a song choice by the groom! During the signing of the Ketubah, we were treated to ‘When You Believe’ by Stephen Schwartz from The Prince Of Egypt – the new West End version.
As well as being a well-known song, it features a Hebrew chorus. I felt like this song perfectly encapsulated both the theatrical and Jewish elements – as well as the rollercoaster journey which we had completed in the planning of a Covid Wedding – ‘There can be miracles, when you believe….’ (We have nicknamed my pupils The Miricles – so this lyric tickled me in more ways than one!)
Countless guests – both religious and not – cited the ceremony as their favourite part. This, I think, is a testament to all our friends who made it so special and also to Rabbi Josh Levy of Alyth Synagogue; he skilfully wove our different Ashkenazi and Sephardi family backgrounds, with their own particular histories and our families‘ personal journeys and losses, into a beautiful overall tapestry.
Chuppah
We used the chuppah from our synagogue – Alyth (North Western Reform Synagogue). It was the same chuppah under which my parents were married in 1979, as well as my sister and her husband in 2010. Since Covid had got in the way of my sister coming to the wedding from Singapore, it was wonderful to have her represented in this way.
Our Music Choice
As you may have gathered, music was very central at the Gellert-Shemtov Shindig. We had a ‘pre-procession’ rendition of ‘S’u Sh’arim’ from Psalm 24 – played by our XS Showband duo of keys and violin. This was the song to which my mother had walked down the aisle at Alyth. The psalm then segued into ‘Part Of Your World’ from Disney’s The Little Mermaid – sung in Hebrew by my singing student Tsiona Hill – as both my mother and father walked me to the chuppah.
Our friend Emily sang ‘Dodi Li’ for our circling, accompanied by Rabbi Josh on the guitar. Back in 2015, Josh and I sang the same psalm for Emily and Dan’s equivalent ritual. #ComingFullCircle. The recessional music was a reprise from The Miricles and “Singing Maids” of ‘When You Believe’. Our first dance was ‘Dreams’ by Gabrielle, sung by friend and singer songwriter – Bethan-Wyn Davies. Danny had decided that this would be our song, way back in the first weeks of our dating-ship.
Flowers
Julia Dilworth from Julia’s Flowers was our talented florist. Although based in Northamptonshire (not exactly a microcosm of Jewish life) she knew all about the chuppah from her time in Leeds and did the most fantastic job with it. The blooms were a mixture of roses, hydrangeas, phalaenopsis orchids and snapdragon, as well as phlox and larkspur with foliage. In keeping with all the sequin and sparkles, Julia even added beautiful little diamanté gems to the centre of each flower in the bouquets and wrapped both my bridesman’s buttonhole and my bridal bouquet in sequin material!
Photographer and videographer
Claudine Hartzel Photography and Minty Slippers respectively.
Most Covid brides will be familiar with Zoom supplier meetings; although we couldn’t meet in person, both Claudine and Danny won us over virtually and it was very easy to say yes to them! One of my favourite photos of the day is a very special moment that Claudine caught of me tearing-up on FaceTime to my sister in Singapore when I first put on my dress. The photo is a perfect example of the shots that are offered up by Claudes.
This will remain a special and treasured moment that Claudine has captured forever. Although there is sadness, it really depicts the reality of having a wedding during the pandemic and also beautifully illustrates love transcending these obstacles. Since it is usually 3-4 months before the wedding video is ready, Minty Slippers have also, very kindly, already sent us over a rough cut of the ceremony/speeches and first dance, so that my sister could watch them in Singapore
Food and Cake
One of my favourite men (aside from my husband) is Keith from Beetroot Catering; he’s a supplier local to Deene Park. In lockdown, Keith also started working at a pub and we had a tremendous tasting there (once the rules permitted us to do so, of course…!) Keith also wanted to do something special for our evening food. So, aware of the Jewish significance, he arranged for smoked salmon and cream cheese bagels to be served at 11pm. This was not his first Jewish rodeo. We chose not to have cake as it’s not something we were that concerned about. Instead, our guests delighted in a large cheese board after dessert.
Entertainment
Since the music was always going to be our centrepiece, I booked our band first – then slotted everything else in around them. We used XS Showband – STG regulars! I was determined to have a showband and XS were super. I work in musical theatre and so had quite a specific idea of the type of band I wanted. Not only did XS tick all of the boxes, but they were so flexible and helpful with all the extras and personal touches I had arranged with friends, colleagues and pupils singing throughout the day – as well as my own surprise number that I performed! They even employed a special sound technician to oversee the choir of thirty-six at the ceremony.
Extra details
As I mentioned, we tried to weave a combination of both musical theatre and Tottenham Hotspur into various aspects of the day. At first consideration, one might not put these two tropes together – but our stationery begged to differ with its afore-mentioned Spurs/musical note emblem (thank you Big Day!) Similarly, our tables were named after musical theatre roles I’d played (and a couple that I should have played….), as well as past and present Tottenham players.
As you might have gathered from the entertainment paragraph, music played a large part in the personal aspects of our day. My pupils (“The Miricles”) and friends (“Singing Maids”) were involved in both the music of the ceremony and musical events during the party- delivering a mixture of Disney, Soul, musical theatre and of course, Judaism.
XS Showband organised for ‘Oyfn Pripetchik’ – a 19th century Yiddish folk song – to be played on the violin during the signing of the Ketubah. Oyfn Pripetchik has very strong significance in my family. It was my maternal great grandfather’s favourite song and he sung it to my grandmother, Nelly, and she to my father, Andrew. I myself performed this song in Prešov, Slovakia in 2013, whilst we laid Stolpersteine stones for the family who perished during the Holocaust. Great grandfather Ludovic had left the house singing it with great grandmother Helen when deported to Auschwitz in 1942. XS, in playing this song, allowed us to honour and remember them all on our wedding day.
One of my close friends – Bethan-Wyn Davies – sang our first dance (‘Dreams’ by Gabrielle), which in turn was choreographed by my friend and colleague Ami. As a finale to these musical inserts, Yours Truly indulged in a bridal speech which led seamlessly (even if I say so myself) into the song ‘Sadie Sadie, Married Lady’ from Jule Styne’s musical Funny Girl, with excellent ensemble performances by three of the Singing Maids.
“How much life can change in three years. I can hardly believe how lucky I’ll am. It’s almost enough to make one…burst into song…”
Honeymoon
We have booked Chile for December with Journey Latin America – a fantastic travel agency that my parents have used for years. They are allowing us to cancel up until 45 days before the trip if Chile is not off the red list. We went to Yorkshire and Lake Windermere for our Minimoon straight after the wedding. A hotel that we would really recommend is Swinton Estate.
Advice to couples currently planning their wedding
Naturally, Covid played a part in difficulties of the year-long lead up. Whilst this was unavoidable, one consequence was that I put up somewhat of an emotional wall to stop getting too excited, lest the wedding be dramatically changed or cancelled. We got engaged in August 2020, so were unsure from the outset as to what shape our wedding would take. I didn’t feel the real excitement until I was in the dress, travelling to the ceremony.
Hindsight is, of course, a wonderful thing. I couldn’t have gotten myself a crystal ball to know that it would all work out, but I do wish that I had looked into how some brides manage to de-stress and enjoy themselves more in the lead up. In particular, on the night before, to see if it made any difference to my lack of sleep on the wedding eve. Some meditation would have come in useful I think!
On a side note, my speech and song ended up being at 10pm (we were running an hour late) so it wasn’t until after then that I could fully relax out of ‘performer mode’. I don’t regret going through with it, but I do wish that we could have found a way to have this earlier – although I suspect that this was the best time for the guests, if not for the bride.
I would say my main regret is that I can now see that I put myself under a huge amount of pressure, although I didn’t realise this at the time. I rather think that this is not uncommon amongst brides, but it certainly serves as an obstacle to enjoying the planning. The things you worry about in the lead up are not usually at the forefront of your mind on the day.
There is a lot of pressure on this day to be the ‘happiest’ and ‘most perfect’ day of your life. This can be a problematic thought during the lead up, on the day, as well as during the comedown afterwards. Remember that it’s one of many happy days that you will have with your partner. It’s often the unplanned moments that we enjoy the most. In taking some of the pressure off this day, you may be in a better position to enjoy it, as well as soften the post-wedding blues.
Remember that it’s not ‘all over’ at the end of the wedding day. It’s just beginning.
What ‘Smashing The Glass’ Did For Us
Thank you to STG for leading us to so many of our suppliers: photography, videography, band, marquee and bridal shop!
MIRI & DANNY’S LITTLE WHITE BOOK
Photography – Claudine Hartzel Photography {offers 10% discount to all members of Smashing The Glass’s Brides Club}
Bride’s dress – Nicole Milano found and customised by Meb at Mirror Mirror {offers £200.00 for accessory purchases over £400 to all members of Smashing The Glass’s Brides Club}
Band – XS Showband – as well ‘The Miricles’ under the musical direction of Timothy Evans
Stationery/Invitation – Big Day Designs {offers 10% discount to all members of Smashing The Glass’s Brides Club}
Marquee – Fews Marquees
Venue – Deene Park Weddings
Videography – Minty Slippers
Bride’s shoes –Christian Louboutin
Bride’s accessories – Gillian Million , Dolecka Bridal
Groom’s attire –Reiss
Bridesmaids/man – Coast, Maya Deluxe, Phase Eight. Adrianna Papell, Next, Fruugo
Bridesmaids Haircombs – Amazon
Hair + Makeup – Stacey Lacey MUA, Aimee Garner MUA, Love Hair by Lou
Flowers – Julia’s Flowers
First Dance – Bethan-Wyn Davies
Catering – Beetroot Catering
Ketubah – our synagogue (Alyth – North Western Reform) made a simple one for us
Rings – Lewis Malka
Hotel – Hicorby
Kippot – Rimmon Judaica
Cars – Exclusive Cars
Travel Agency – Journey Latin America
If you’re a Jewish or Jew-ish bride-to-be, you’ll want to join Smashing The Glass’ Brides Club. Guided by the world’s number 1 Jewish wedding expert, Karen Cinnamon, Brides Club is the private community for Jewish and Jew-ish brides that removes wedstress and indecision and gives you what you need to plan with confidence during these uncertain times. Join our Brides Club here.