In uncertain times, there’s nothing like a return to the familiar. Which is why the homecoming-themed Jewish wedding of Savannah, who works as the development director at a Jewish nonprofit, and Josh, who’s starting law school this fall, who opted to wed at the University of Missouri (also known as Mizzou), where they met as college freshmen.
These two truly followed STG’s motto of “your Jewish wedding, your way.” They worked together to craft an ultra-personal ceremony that paired the traditional structure with the couple’s egalitarian values. Since lots of the guests had never before attended a Jewish wedding, Savannah and Josh also put together a program explaining the ceremony – which doubled as a fan, perfect for keeping cool in the Missouri heat! They even FaceTimed the bride’s grandma in, since she couldn’t travel to attend in person – this is such a great way to include long-distance loved ones, and in light of COVID-19 its’s something we’ll probably start seeing a lot more of.
And how special is it that Josh’s dad built the couple’s chuppah, and his mom decorated it? They even made it so it can be taken apart and moved easily, and Savannah and Josh have since repurposed it as a sukkah! Don’t miss it in the beautiful photos from Chase Castor and Cam Wiley of Kindling.
We’re also in love with the couple’s cool contemporary ketubah from Smashing The Glass Recommended Vendor Ink with Intent. It’s a true piece of art, which now hands proudly outside Savannah and Josh’s bedroom. These two even wrote their own ketubah text, based on the egalitarian structure with some personal touches thrown in.
There’s so much more we could say about this joyous Jewish wedding, but we’ll let the bride – who looked beautiful in Lis Simon Bridal – tell you the rest…
How we met
Savannah, the bride: Josh and I met as 18-year-old college freshmen at the University of Missouri. We were set up accidentally by a mutual friend, Clayton, and I didn’t even think Josh liked me that much! I complained to Clayton that I was bored — he was out of town — and he told me to see what Josh was up to. So, that was the first time I talked to Josh one-on-one, and we then proceeded to get locked out of our dorms in the rain.
We spent all night talking outside our dorm and because it was 3 a.m., our friends weren’t answering their phones and the dorm assistant on call was asleep. We were truly locked out until the early risers woke up! The next day, Josh asked me out on our first date, where our friend (and my bridesmaid), Katie, picked out both of our first date outfits without telling either of us. So, thanks to Clayton and Katie, we’re now happily married!
A College Wedding
We got married at the University of Missouri (also known as Mizzou) in Columbia, Missouri. It’s where Josh and I met as college freshmen, where we fell in love and where Josh proposed. We got married on Traditions Plaza, an outdoor amphitheater in the center of campus, and tented the quad behind it for our reception.
Homecoming
Mizzou, where we had our wedding, invented the idea of “homecoming,” calling alumni back to their alma mater, and that was the idea of how we wanted our wedding to feel. We wanted to have a homecoming of our own: a weekend of celebration with our friends and family.
A Lis Simon Dress
My dress was from a Canadian designer, Lis Simon Bridal. I combined two different pieces: a sweetheart top with seeded pearl straps and a full A-line skirt for a custom dress made of a silky-satin so it had structure without feeling too heavy. I tried on about 30 or 35 dresses, because I knew what I didn’t want, and couldn’t figure out what I actually wanted. With the help of the amazing Something White Bridal ladies in Kansas City, I found the simple, elegant style that was just right. I knew it was the one because I couldn’t stop thinking about it. And it had pockets.
POCKETS!
Toward the end of our reception, I changed into a white shift dress from Lilly Pulitzer — one of my favorite brands — and a denim jacket that had “wife of the party” on the back so I could fully get down on the dance floor.
Accessories
My veil was special! The raw-edge cathedral-length veil was my “something borrowed,” and came from my friend Diana. She wore the veil at her wedding a few years previously and I was honored to get to borrow it. It completely brought my look together.
Kate Spade Keds
I had a long walk down my aisle involving steps and brick pavers, so I knew I needed something that wouldn’t be a trip hazard. Kate Spade teamed up with Keds to make gold sparkly sneakers with silk laces and I knew immediately that I wanted them. Gold is one of Mizzou’s colors, too, and part of our color palette. They were so great to wear, especially when I ran across Mizzou’s football field, and I love getting to rewear them and reminisce on our wedding day.
Hair + Makeup
I wanted to look like myself but special. I chose to have my hair mostly down and enhance my natural curls, with airbrush makeup (which 100% lasted all day and night) with golden details. My lipstick was my favorite shade from Charlotte Tilbury, called “Pillow Talk.” My bridal party and I took over Blowout Fanatic, a blowout bar in Columbia, Mo., and spent the morning drinking champagne, snacking and getting beautified. We wore matching buttondown shirts with our monograms on it.
The handsome groom
Josh and his groomsmen all wore grey suits from The Black Tux. Josh chose to stand out with a striped seersucker bowtie, while the other men wore navy bowties. He chose to go without vests for a more modern look (and comfort, he jokes). They all wore Mizzou trouser socks, too!
Bridesmaids
I did have plenty of really fabulous bridesmaids. They wore blush dresses from Brideside’s in-house line. I chose four different styles, and they picked their favorites from there for a nice mix of looks. My sister, my Maid of Honor, accented hers with a gold wrap.
Before lining up to walk down the aisle, I took time with my bridesmaids for a quick meditation led by my friend (and bridesmaid) Elli. She had us take a few deep breaths and set good intentions for my marriage. We followed it up by saying the Shehecheyanu prayer together — which some of my non-Jewish bridesmaids took upon themselves to learn before our wedding — as a way to express gratefulness for this special first.
Chuppah
We both were drawn to more modern and minimalist chuppahs. Josh’s dad, David, designed and built our chuppah by hand (without any instructions!) as an 8’ x 8’ freestanding square with toile and eucalyptus decorating it. There was enough space under it for us, both sets of our parents and our rabbi. Josh’s dad created our gorgeous chuppah, which was decorated by Josh’s mom before our wedding. They made it so it can easily be taken apart and moved, and it’s now used as our Sukkah every year for Sukkot. We put it up a few weeks after our wedding for our first Sukkah party and it was beautiful all over again.
Ceremony
We spent so much time writing our ceremony together. We wanted to make it very intentional, so we wrote a ceremony that took the traditional Jewish structure and made it egalitarian, thoughtful and ours. To choose one favorite moment is impossible! With the knowledge that this would be the first Jewish wedding for many of our guests, we created programs that doubled as fans detailing what would happen during our wedding. My group of girlfriends who religiously watch “The Bachelor” with me each week helped put them together!
Highlights from our ceremony:
I walked down the aisle to Debbie Friedman’s ‘L’Chi Lach’, one of my all-time favorite Jewish songs. It was performed by three of my cousins singing and on the guitar. My parents later said that they had chills from hearing it as we walked down the aisle together.
For circling, we each circled the other three times, and completed the seventh circle together. Then, we entered the chuppah for the first time together, holding hands, to symbolize our equal partnership.
Our officiant, Rabbi Doug Alpert of Congregation Kol Ami (our synagogue), did an amazing job of making sure everyone followed along with every part of our wedding, explaining why we made our choices and had everyone laughing or wiping away happy tears. He even found time to tease me about my love for organized spreadsheets.
Rabbi Doug spoke about our relationship and connected it to the Kabbalistic concept of “tzimtzum,” that our relationship is one where we make space for the other, that for us, 1 + 1 = 3. He had us — and our friends and family — tearing up at his explanation that the two of us together are greater than the sum of our parts. It’s something that sets the tone for us daily.
During the kiddush, we used two different kiddush cups for the wine. One was used at my parents’ wedding almost 30 years ago, the other was from my bat mitzvah.
While exchanging our rings, Josh and I both recited “Ani L’Dodi V’Dodi Li,” which translates from Hebrew as “I am my beloved’s and my beloved is mine.” We then followed it with our own personal vows, which we both closed with lines we wrote in our ketubah.
For smashing the glass, Josh chose to do it (I was too scared — mostly because my uncle, an ER doctor, shared a horror story about someone getting shards in their foot and spending their reception in the hospital). We loved hearing the yells of “Mazel tov” immediately after.
Immediately following our recessional (‘Home’ by Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros), we went to our yichud, and had snacks together while our guests played yard games and enjoyed cocktail hour. Our photographers got us and we headed to Mizzou’s football stadium, Faurot Field. I had arranged field access ahead of time and was able to surprise Josh. The look of joy on our faces, captured by our phenomenal photographers, as we ran down onto the field was the best. A Mizzou tradition is to kiss the 50-yard line on the football field, and we were able to do that.
My grandma (I can’t say her age because she’ll yell at me) was unable to travel to our wedding, so my aunt was able to FaceTime her in so she was “with us.” We were able to say hi to her, and she was carried around for our reception, too. We loved it
Ketubah
Our ketubah is from Ink with Intent! We chose a modern style, and it now hangs outside our bedroom. We wrote our own ketubah text, following the egalitarian structure. It was harder than we thought — it was like writing vows! In fact, we ended up using some of our wording in our vows. We drew inspiration from lots of places, from Smashing the Glass to our friends’ ketubah (shoutout to Jenna and Ethan), to sitting around with a notebook over slices of pizza.
Our music choice
Our processional for our bridal party and Josh and his parents was an acoustic version of ‘Chasing Cars’ by Snow Patrol. My parents and I walked down the aisle to ‘L’Chi Lach’ by Debbie Friedman, a song I grew up loving. It was performed by three of my cousins, Grant, Julia and Cole Banfill, who sang it and played guitar together.
Our recessional was ‘Home’ by Edward Sharpe & the Magnetic Zeros, a song we both love.
We entered our reception to Mizzou’s Fight Song, through a spirit tunnel made by our loving bridal party. Following the Hamotzi with our families, we did a combination father/daughter and mother/son dance to the Missouri Waltz. This was a special choice for my dad and I, because he, too, graduated from Mizzou.
Josh and I had our first dance to ‘Tiny Dancer’ by Elton John. We’ve always loved this song, and it ties into a nickname Josh has for me, his 5’3” bride. We purposefully chose a song we’d hear again to make us smile.
We, of course, had the Hora at our wedding! My mom had a nightmare that I would fall off one of the chairs and break my nose, but we made it through the chair lifting unscathed! It was such a fun moment to be lifted together in chairs and neither of us could stop laughing. ‘Hava Nagila’ always gets a party started!
Just as last call was announced at the end of the night, we shut down the dance floor with ‘Wagon Wheel’ by Old Crow Medicine Show. This song is a classic at Mizzou parties, and at our favorite college piano bar, and our family and friends knew to form a big circle for a drunken singalong. Josh and I were in the middle and we looked around at our 100-something guests attempting to sing and felt the love of our community. Truly, we felt our community all night long, but this moment in particular is etched in our minds.
Following this, our guests ran out of our reception tent to line up for our glowstick exit, while we had a last dance for the two of us to ‘The Luckiest’ by Ben Folds, a favorite of Josh’s.
Flowers
After being told that the flowers I wanted wouldn’t hold up to the Missouri heat, we looked for other options. A friend sent me to Something Borrowed Blooms, a silk floral rental company and it was perfect! The flowers are all rental, and look and smell real! I was able to choose the bouquets and centerpieces I wanted. A hilarious moment was explaining to a friend that the flowers weren’t real; she didn’t believe me until she went over and stuck her face in the centerpiece!
Photographer
We cannot brag enough about our photographers, Chase Castor and Cam Wiley of Kindling. They specialize in documentary-style photography and captured so many special moments. We love going through the thousand-something photos they gave us and reliving moments that we didn’t even remember happening! These two are the best around. We loved them the second we met for Old Fashioned cocktails together.
Food
Our catering was done by the University Club, which handles most of Mizzou’s events. At our first meeting, Josh said that all I cared about was having mac & cheese (absolutely true) so maybe we could do something Southern inspired? Again, we wanted this weekend to feel “us” so comfort food was an obvious choice. Our menu was loaded with yes, a macaroni & cheese bar, but also: pan-fried chicken, eggplant grits, roasted green beans, cheesy hushpuppies, mashed potatoes, buttermilk biscuits, jalapeño cornbread and so much more. Everyone’s plates were full (and then they went back for seconds and thirds, or so we heard).
Cake
Our cake was a last-minute addition, because frankly, we forgot about a cake until two weeks out. Josh worked with Hy-Vee, which is a local grocery store, to do a marbled cake covered in marble-patterned fondant with a line from our Alma Mater song calligraphied on there: “Ours are hearts that fondly love thee.” It was a clever nod to Mizzou, and also to our wedding.
Entertainment
We met with Fernando Esquivel of Fernando Productions and knew we had to have him as our DJ. After some uncomfortable experiences at other weddings with that cheesy, cringe-worthy “wedding DJ,” we knew this choice would make or break our dream of having a constantly full dance floor. Fernando made that dream happen and more! He uses digital turntables to mix songs, so there was never that dead space between songs and had such great ideas (like mixing ‘Hava Nagila’ into ‘September’ by Earth, Wind & Fire).
Kippot
We got gold satin kippot made with “I stole this from Savannah & Josh’s Wedding” and our wedding date inscribed. They were a hit! We have a few extras if anyone wants some! 🙂
Burying a bottle of bourbon
Having an outdoor wedding can always be a risk. We had a strong weather plan in place, but also took some precautions. Like burying the bourbon. According to a tradition from the Southeastern U.S., where my family is originally from, burying an unopened bottle of bourbon at the site of your wedding a month ahead of time guarantees good weather, which you then dig up on the morning of your wedding day.
While Mizzou didn’t like the idea of us burying alcohol on a college campus, we filled a planter full of dirt (sorry, Mizzou Campus Facilities!) and buried some bourbon. Even before we dug it up for our first look, people were already remarking on the perfect weather: 70ºF and partly cloudy, strangely beautiful for a season usually full of hot, humid days. As bourbon lovers, we’re excited to open this bottle on our first wedding anniversary.
Speech
My mom gave a phenomenal and touching speech (with hilarious interjections from my dad) about how Josh is marrying in to our family, and that his family is now forever a part of our loud, crazy family.
Signage
Our signage throughout our wedding, from bar signs with cocktails “created” by our pets, Rey and Scout, to oversized directional sandwich boards was made by our dear friend and groomsman, Clayton, who helped set us up when we were in college together. (He and one of my bridesmaids, Katie, are both the reason Josh and I met and went on a first date together.)
Sigma Kappa Tradition
I was able to have a candlepass with my sorority sisters, which is a Sigma Kappa tradition where we pass a candle to commemorate a sister’s lavalier (receiving a fraternity pin from a boyfriend), engagement or marriage. We have a traditional song that we sing (mostly on-key), and this time, Josh was able to join us as we passed our candle. It’s a sweet and sentimental moment — Josh lavaliered me with his fraternity letters while we were in college, so this was a throwback to that moment.
Honeymoon
For our honeymoon, we spent two weeks in Europe! We each chose a city: Josh chose his favorite, London, and I chose Paris, because why not. It was the perfect adventure for us, as we both love history and exploring. We wandered trendy neighborhoods in London, ate cheese in the gardens of Versailles, had the best tikka masala at Dishoom in Kensington, and spent time popping in and out of museums and bookstores in both cities. (Any Monet fan has to stop by Musée de l’Orangeries!)
Advice to couples currently planning their wedding
Build out intentional moments for yourself. Everyone says the day goes by so fast, so by planning time to meditate or talk to each table helps keep it from being a complete blur. And keep some moments for yourself — some of my favorite moments or photos are ones that I don’t share on social media.
Savannah & Josh’s little white book
Photography – Kindling
Ketubah – Ink With Intent {offers 10% discount to all members of Smashing The Glass’s Brides Club}
Venue – University of Missouri
Bride’s dresses – Lis Simon Bridal found and fitted at Something White Bridal and Lilly Pulitzer
Bride’s shoes – Kate Spade
Groom and groomsmen – The Black Tux
Bridesmaids – Brideside
Hair + Makeup – Blowout Fanatic
Flowers – Something Borrowed Blooms
Catering – University Club
Cake – Hy-Vee
DJ – Fernando Productions
Rentals – A1 Rentals
Rabbi – Doug Alpert
Kippot – A1 Skullcap
Alterations – Sharon’s Couture Alterations
Smash The Glass Pouch – Smashing The Glass Etsy Shop {or join Smashing The Glass’s Brides Club and get one for free!}
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